


boomerang

by neverlxnd



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: ;), Alternate Universe - High School, Basketball, Declarations Of Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Kissing, M/M, Mentioned NCT Dream Ensemble, Na Jaemin is a Softie, Post-Break Up, Promposal, Reconciliation, Underage Drinking, fuck i never know what to tag, help ya girl out, lol, mark is in university, nomin, ok idk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-26
Updated: 2018-06-26
Packaged: 2019-05-28 17:16:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 22,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15054014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neverlxnd/pseuds/neverlxnd
Summary: Jaemin thinks his life is like a boomerang, the question is if whether or not it'll take him out or he'll catch it.orJaemin and Jeno break up at the end of their sophomore year, and Jaemin switches schools for his junior year to focus on his studies, only to return for his senior year.





	boomerang

**Author's Note:**

> for the lovely sprouts on twt<3  
> also, there's none of that nasty shit in here cause in this house, we don't sexualize the dreamies or anyone underage smh

By definition, a boomerang is to return to the originator, often with negative consequences. A boomerang could also be the flat piece of wood that spins back to you after you’ve thrown it a distance. Sometimes, Jaemin thinks life is a boomerang. Not the bad kind where it’s always coming back to him in negative karma, but the kind where he’s thrown something and it has come back to him. Rightfully? Maybe, maybe not.

However, when he pulls into the parking lot of the school he used to attend, the school where he’s grown up in, the school where he’s met all of his friends, where he’s met Jeno. He’s not sure whether or not to call it a boomerang that hits him in the face just yet. He missed Jeno, he’s missed his friends and this school.

Jaemin feels nervous stepping out of his car, throwing the strap of his backpack over his shoulder and locking the doors. To be fair, he has a good reason to be nervous. It’s the first day of school of his senior year, his last year. He’s going to, hopefully, graduate with all of his old classmates and all of his friends. But that’s not _entirely_ why he’s so nervous.

No.

Jaemin is nervous as he walks into the school because of what happened during his sophomore year. If you were to ask anyone about Jaemin and Jeno during their freshmen and sophomore years, the answer would be simple; relationship goals. It’s not exaggerated when they say the _whole_ school adored the couple. However, if you were to ask someone about Jaemin and Jeno _now_ , although the answer would be simple, it would be unfortunately simple; broken up. It’s not like either of them wanted to break up. Jaemin truly loved Jeno, he would have given the whole world to Jeno if he asked. There were just _some_ things that Jaemin couldn’t handle, or Jeno for that matter.

Everything was fine during their freshmen year; it was their sophomore year where things started to get bumpy. Jeno had begun to join every sport known to their school, Jaemin excelled in his academics and was picked for several academic opportunities. But Jaemin slowly began to realize that Jeno was too invested in sports, never once doubting that Jeno thought the exact same thing about Jaemin and his studies. So just before the end of their sophomore year, they called it off. It wasn’t dramatic, but Jaemin still cried for days. Even though they broke up, they still smiled at each other for the remainder of the school year, only talking when necessary. But, Jaemin’s friends were also _Jeno’s_ friends, so it was hard to avoid him.

Jaemin startles when the bell rings, signaling the warning before the day begins. It might be odd to say, but he’s missed this school’s bell. The school he switched to for his junior year wasn’t that far from this one, but it was horrible. Since he and Jeno broke up, his grades were still good but not permissible for his parents, which is exactly why they agreed to send him to a private school. The school he transferred to was bland and boring, something Jaemin wasn’t used to, especially being friends with someone like Lee Donghyuck. Said boy suddenly appears next to Jaemin, slinging his arm around his shoulder.

“Na Jaemin is back everyone! No need to adjust your vision, the boy next door with the dazzling smile _has_ in fact returned to Minjok Academy!” Hyuck is wearing an ecstatic grin on his face, Jaemin hasn’t seen Hyuck smile this big since school has ended sophomore year–and today is the _first_ day of school. Granted, it’s their senior year.

Jaemin rolls his eyes and switches the book in his hand to his unoccupied one to wrap his arm around Hyuck’s waist.

“Shut up, why do you have to be so dramatic?”

Hyuck grins.

Despite sharing mutual friends with Jeno, Hyuck has always been someone Jaemin could count on. He was the first person Jaemin told when he broke things with Jeno. Jaemin briefly reminds himself of how Hyuck wouldn’t leave his house until his parents called Jaemin’s to tell him to come home.

“Senior year,” Hyuck scrunches his nose up, breathing in an abnormal amount of oxygen. “I can already smell the freedom.”

“By freedom you mean getting a job or going to university,” Jaemin sighs.

Hyuck turns his head to glare at him.

“Must you be so negative?” Hyuck huffs. “Come on! It’s senior year and you’re finally back! Do you know how much I missed you?”

Jaemin snorts.

“You just miss picking on someone.”

“That’s true, _but_ Mark was a very good replacement while you were gone,” Hyuck nods with a small grin.

“How is he, anyway?” Jaemin asks, stopping when he remembers he’s supposed to be looking for his locker. He looks down at the small slip sandwiched between his book and his thumb. 185. “Either I’ve been gone too long or they moved the lockers.”

“You’ve been gone too long,” Hyuck dismisses. “Mark’s in college now. He hasn’t talked to any of us for awhile actually, too busy for us high schoolers, I guess,” Hyuck rolls his eyes.

Jaemin looks at the paper, then the locker numbers. Before the wrinkle in his forehead can deepen, Hyuck takes the slip and glances at it before pulling Jaemin back in the direction they came from.

“I’m sure Mark is just busy, college is hard Hyuck.”

“Clearly not hard enough to party though, right? I’ve been watching his stories on Snapchat and he posts on there _at least_ twice every weekend. Does the boy even study?” Hyuck huffs.

Jaemin refuses to answer that question because before he switched schools, Mark used to hang out with them sometimes during lunch break, even after school. Mark was a really demanded classmate, popular if you may, it’s a wonder the boy even stuck around after Jeno introduced Mark to Hyuck. If Mark was anything, it was clever. Witty, sometimes, but dumb? Never.

“You know what I think?” Jaemin quips, not waiting for the boy’s answer. “I think you should focus on _your_ studying. Shouldn’t you be worried about whether _you_ pass your classes and not Mark’s?”

Hyuck waves his hand dismissively. They stop in front of a random locker, all in it’s glory of dents and chipped painting with the silver plate encrusted with the numbers, _185_.

It’s quiet for the moment as Hyuck settles his back against the locker beside Jaemin’s, arms crossed and eyes transfixed on the floor tiles. Hyuck’s too quiet, Jaemin thinks, as he twists the lock with the correct digits. He’s known Hyuck for too long to know that when he gets quiet, it’s because one of the three reasons.

  1. He’s in a classroom
  2. He’s eating



or 3. He’s overthinking.

Jaemin’s not a psychologist, but they’re not in class, Hyuck’s not eating and well, he’s staring into the distance, so he’s going to go with number three.

“You’re being oddly quiet,” he mumbles, huffing when he tries the lock but it doesn’t budge.

Hyuck shrugs. Another sign that he’s overthinking.

“I–“ Hyuck bites his lip and turns his body so his shoulder leans on the locker instead. “Have you talked to Jeno? At all?”

It shouldn’t be a sensitive subject for Jaemin, and it isn’t. But the way Hyuck is biting his lip and raising his eyebrows makes it seem that way. Like he’s made of glass still from the breakup last year. His hand falters on the lock, momentarily stalling the twisting, he shakes his head.

“Not really. Why?” He asks after a beat.

Hyuck shrugs again.

“I don’t know. Has he tried to contact you at least?”

Jaemin sighs and gives up on his lock, turning to Hyuck.

“What’s with the sudden Jeno questions?” He raises an eyebrow.

Hyuck contemplates for a moment before he opens his mouth, but then–

“Who’s asking Jeno questions?”

Remember when Jaemin said his life was kind of like a boomerang? That’s the first thing his mind falls to when he hears that voice. The next thing that comes is that Jeno just might be his boomerang, because even though they broke up and he switched schools, Jeno is standing behind Hyuck and opening the locker next to Hyuck. Next to _his_ locker.

“Uh,” Hyuck purses his lips, widening his eyes at Jaemin.

Jaemin furrows his eyebrows at Hyuck, who seems to be playing charades? The boy is waving his arms around in front of him, as if Jaemin can see the invisible paint Hyuck is splattering. Spoiler, he can’t. Hyuck dips his head back and clenches his eyes shut in defeat.

“Hello? Am I talking to the ghost of Donghyuck?” Jeno chuckles.

Finally, Jaemin sees Jeno’s hand grip Hyuck’s shoulder and move him backwards. At the same time Jeno opens his mouth to speak, his smile making his eyes squint the same way Jaemin remembers. However, when Jeno’s eyes fall on Jaemin’s the smile is gone and his mouth goes dry.

“Um, I was trying to tell you your locker is next to Jeno’s,” Hyuck mumbles, looking towards the ground between the two ex lovers.

Jaemin is at a loss for words. He’s spent a whole summer, a whole school year thinking about Jeno. He’s spent countless times running over what he wish he had said or done to keep them from breaking up. But now Jeno is standing in front of him and he’s forgotten every word in his vocabulary. Jeno’s hair is blonde now, the long strands of white falling down onto his forehead and the side of his face, and he doesn’t hesitate to think to himself how good he looks.

“Jaemin,” Jeno finally says.

“I’m Jaemin,” he blurts out.

In the corner of his eye, Jaemin can see Hyuck trying not to laugh. He’s going to be honest, he’d be laughing too if it were someone else, but this is his life and this is actually happening _right now_. He’s standing in front of his ex who he hasn’t spoken to in a year and a half–and now he’s going to be locker neighbors with him. Great.

“So, well. I got stuff to do, um, welcome back Jaemin and I’ll see you at lunch. Later, Jeno.” Hyuck waves before speed walking down the hallway and turning the corner.

The hallway is near empty, a couple of students at their lockers due to the early morning.

“You’re back,” Jeno says.

Jeno’s voice is deep, honeyed and soft. It’s been a year and a half but Jeno has grown quite a bit taller too.

He nods.

“Yeah. I–“

Jeno slams his locker shut.

“Sorry, I gotta talk to my science teacher before class. Um, welcome back.”

Before Jaemin can give so much as a thank you, Jeno is gone as quickly as he blinks. He briefly wonders if Jeno’s voice was so curt, so monotone, because he’s not a morning person. But that thought is quickly abandoned when he turns around, facing the direction Jeno took off in to see said boy talking with another student at their locker. He turns back to his own locker and scoffs to himself, trying once again to open his locker. The locker he’s supposed to have until the end of the year, next to Jeno, his ex. When the lock clicks, he pretends that his heart doesn’t hurt. It doesn’t hurt that Jeno wasn’t smiling at him for once, it doesn’t hurt that Jeno completely lied to his face just so he wouldn’t have to talk to him, it doesn’t hurt.

 

True to his word, Hyuck was waiting by his locker at lunchtime, a smile and a wave waiting alongside.

“How’s being back so far? Anybody fall to your feet, oh gracious Na Jaemin?” Hyuck sighs dramatically and places the back of his hand on his forehead.

Jaemin rolls his eyes and opens his locker.

“It was okay. And _no_ , a few numbers thrown my way but no one at my feet sadly,” he quips.

Hyuck seems to notice the dry tone in his voice.

“How was this morning?”

Jaemin knows exactly what Hyuck is asking about, whether or not he wants to answer it, who knows. He ends up choosing to anyway.

“It was weird, but I wasn’t expecting anything else. We used to date, of course it’s going to be awkward, it’s not supposed to be smiles and hugs,” he shoves his book in his empty locker. He grimaces at the emptiness of the walls, he needs to fill those up quickly.

“Yeah but, Jeno’s not an asshole and neither are you, _most_ of the time anyway.”

“Wow, thanks,” he says, voice dry.

Hyuck rolls his eyes.

“You know what I mean, Jeno isn’t the type to hold a grudge or anything. Especially since you guys used to be best friends before you–“ Hyuck stops himself before saying the words, as if _dated_ would crack him.

“It’s okay, Hyuck. You can say it, it’s not a forbidden word. We’re all friends, it was bound to come up anyway,” he reassures.

Hyuck nods.

“Does Jeno know you were gone all summer? He was trying to–“

He sighs loudly, turning to Hyuck and frowning.

“Hyuck, I don’t want to sound like an asshole but I really don’t want to be questioned about Jeno right now. We used to date, we’re ex’s now and it’s completely fine. That’s the end.” He’s not entirely sure if he’s trying to convince Hyuck or himself.

“Right,” Hyuck nods. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring him up all the time.”

“It’s alright, Hyuck. I still love you,” Jaemin jokes, pinching the boy’s cheek only for him to slap his hand away, resulting in him cackling.

They begin to head towards the cafeteria, it’s not until they’re nearing the doors that Jaemin realizes just how fast his heart is beating.

“Do the others know you’re back?” Hyuck asks, digging his fingers through his jeans for money.

“I haven’t seen Jisung and Chenle, but I met up with Renjun this morning in math class,” he hums.

Hyuck nods and directs them towards the doors of the cafeteria.

“It’s your lucky day then,” Hyuck grins, opening the door. “It’s Tuesday, which means they should be sitting with us today.”

Jaemin wants to ask what Hyuck means by that, but he’s being shoved through the doors before he can. The cafeteria is loud and buzzing, a vast difference from his time being at a private school. Some of the students passing by smile at Jaemin, some even hug him and congratulate him on coming back.

“Aren’t you popular,” Hyuck clicks his tongue.

He rolls his eyes.

“It’s just because I switched schools, it’ll be gone by tomorrow,” he says, following Hyuck towards the food line.

While they get their food, Jaemin listens to Hyuck ramble on about how boring his summer was, how he missed school because of friends, how much he hates school. He supposes it’s better than the boy asking him every second of the day about Jeno.

“–and I _told_ him on the phone that I specifically wanted half of the pizza without cheese. I spent the whole night waiting for my pizza and when they finally did get it right, the asshole gave the pizza to me unsliced. Can you believe that?”

Jaemin snorts, smiling at the staff while he gets handed his change.

“That sounds like something that would only happen to you, so yes, I can believe that.”

Hyuck scoffs.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

He follows Hyuck through the cafeteria, moving towards a table. It’s only until he remembers the familiar large window they pass that they’re heading to the same table they used to sit at in their freshmen year. It warms his heart at the same exact time that it breaks. His friends have stuck together even after he left for a whole school year, they’ve all been friends while he’s been away. But at the same time, they have all moved along, grew together and he’s missed so much of it. As someone who has created so many great memories at that lunch table, it hurts to know that he’s not apart of the ones his friends made during junior year. They’re nearing the table when he pulls Hyuck’s elbow, almost tripping the boy backwards in the process.

“What the hell Nana, I have _jello_ on my tray,” Hyuck hisses.

Jaemin dry swallows.

“No, Jeno doesn’t know.”

Hyuck has confusion written on his face, he sighs.

“He doesn’t know I was gone all summer.”

“Oh,” Hyuck hums. “You should tell him. He–“

“Is that Na Jaemin?”

Jisung’s voice is loud in the air, cutting through the serious atmosphere that has now evaporated. Jaemin looks towards the voice, tilting his body so he’s looking past Hyuck’s shoulder. Low and behold, Jisung is at the table and standing, a smile adorning his face.

“Park Jisung,” he grins, pulling Hyuck towards the table to sit.

He briefly looks around the table at the smiling faces. Renjun is grinning from ear to ear while Chenle is watching him with excitement in his eyes. Jisung pulls him into a bone-crushing hug and he now realizes that he has to look _up_ at Jisung, something he hasn’t done before.

“Glad to have you back.” Jisung grins, sitting back down.

He coos at the younger, sitting down beside Jisung and leaning his head on his shoulder.

“Aw, did my baby bunny miss me?” He teases.

Jisung rolls his eyes, shrugging Jaemin’s head off.

“You’re going to make me regret sitting here today,” Jisung whines.

That reminds him.

He turns to Hyuck and furrows his eyebrows.

“What did you mean by, it’s Tuesday so that means Jisun nad Chenle are sitting with us today?” He asks.

The table falls quiet, clearly not expecting the question. Renjun avoids eye contact, Chenle looks at Jisung with slightly widened eyes and Hyuck quietly sips his juice box.

“Well,” he presses. “Are you guys going to answer me, or do I have to ask again?” He peels open his boxed sandwich, waiting for an answer. When he doesn’t, and Hyuck’s sipping gets louder, he groans. “What’s gotten into you guys? I know I missed a whole summer with you guys but we all still talked during junior year.”

Chenle yelps and turns to glare at Renjun, whom Jaemin guesses kicked him under the table. The smaller boy sighs and turns to Jaemin with a tight-lipped smile.

“Well, you see. Since you and Jeno,” Chenle falters before clearing his throat. “During junior year, we all kind of got into different clubs and activities.”

“Meaning?” He waves his hand.

“Since we all have different commitments now, we can’t exactly sit with each other on certain days. Mondays, Renjun sits with the poetry club. Wednesdays, Jisung and Jeno sit with the basketball team, Fridays, me and Hyuck sit with the choir kids.”

He slowly nods, trying to understand when his friends became okay with this. Was anybody mad at the sudden seating schedule? Would this have happened if he didn’t switch schools? What did Jeno think of this?

“So you guys only sit together on Tuesdays and Thursdays?” He points out.

Hyuck nods.

“Yeah, but don’t worry we still hang out on the weekends,” Renjun clarifies.

“So if it’s Tuesday, where’s Jeno?” He asks.

The exact moment the question leaves his mouth, a loud roar comes from one of the tables across the cafeteria. They all turn towards the source of the sound to find Jeno and several boys greeting him to their table. High fives and side hugs.

“I guess he’s sitting with the basketball team today,” Chenle chuckles.

They resume talking about their new classes, their summers, and everything Jaemin might have missed. From across the cafeteria, he’s looking at Jeno with the basketball team, chattering loudly and laughing. Jeno looks at the floor before turning his head the slightest to look over his shoulder at him. Jaemin’s breath gets caught in his throat for a moment and they maintain eye contact until Jaemin’s sure his eyes burn from not blinking for so long. While Renjun angrily chatters about his new poetry club leader, Jisung leans over to him and whispers.

“Jeno probably just wants to catch up with the basketball team. He hasn’t seen them all summer,” Jisung reassures with a smile.

He sends the younger a grateful smile before Jisung returns to the conversation to contribute to their debate. He looks back at Jeno with a sigh.

Jeno hasn’t seen _him_ all summer either though.

 

Jaemin thought that maybe that first day was probably just the shell shock, Jeno hasn’t seen him since their last day of school sophomore year. But the next day it happens again. And the next day. And the next day after that. Then it’s a cycle, and Jaemin’s sure it wasn’t a one time thing. The second time Jaemin tried to talk to Jeno was one early morning when they were both at their lockers. He was trying to be nice, tell him good morning and it almost worked until Jeno sighed way too loud for Jaemin’s liking and gave him a tight-lipped smile before leaving. (“Basketball practice”, which was odd because in what world are there fifteen minute practices?) The third time Jaemin tried to talk to Jeno was when he was in the library. Jeno had happened to stumble down the same aisle he was in, looking for a book just as Jaemin was. He had turned to smile at Jeno but the boy wasn’t looking, eyes focused on the shelved books. He should have known from the way Jeno’s shoulders slumped when he greeted him that Jeno obviously doesn’t want to talk to him. Still though, he tried. (“This is the wrong aisle, sorry, I really have to find this book for class.”) Across the room, Jaemin had later seen Jeno walk back down that aisle and grab a book off the shelf. After that, Jaemin thought that maybe there was no chance of them being the same best friends they used to be, so all he could do was to be nice to Jeno and only talk when necessary.

Jaemin walked into the cafeteria by himself, a tray already in hand and eyes frantically searching the tables. Their empty one would do fine, he wasn’t really looking to make new friends. It’s Friday, which meant Hyuck and Chenle would be sitting with the choir kids today. He quickly figured that if one of their friends were sitting at a different table, then everyone would be sitting with their own club. It didn’t bother Jaemin that he sat alone on days that weren’t Tuesday and Thursday, he liked being alone sometimes. Though he couldn’t stop his friends from pitifully looking at him from their own tables, as if Jaemin was secluded out. He wasn’t. They were lots of clubs he could join, he just chooses not to.

“Nana!”

He looks up from his phone to the voice calling him, grinning at Jisung when his eyes land on the lanky boy standing up. Jisung flings his hand in the air, waving Jaemin over. He considers it, but quickly dismisses the idea when he realizes that Jisung is sitting with the basketball team.

“Come on Jaemin,” Jisung whines, resembling an angry baby.

Jaemin rolls his eyes and lifts his tray. The younger grins in victory before sitting back down, ushering the other boys to make room. When Jaemin gets there, he picks out one face quicker than the rest, specifically a face that doesn’t look particularly happy that he’s sitting with the team.

“Are you sure this is okay?” He only looks at Jisung when he asks, but talks loud enough so the whole team hears over the buzzing of the cafeteria.

The basketball team doesn’t look pissed off, nor displeased that he’s seated, all but one. Jeno keeps his head low, avoiding his direction and quietly eating his lunch. Jaemin sighs and turns to his own food.

“What’s your name, dude,” a boy asks him.

The boy is handsome to say the least, he’s sure he can find a better and bigger word to describe this guy’s face but right now he can’t seem to.

“Uh, Na Jaemin,” he responds.

The boy nods and smiles, dusting his hands to rid the crumbs before reaching over the table (much to Jeno’s dismay) and leaving his hand out to Jaemin.

“I’m Han, I transferred here during junior year.”

Jaemin nods, almost forgetting to take his outstretched hand. He gently takes Han’s hand, barely grasping his fingers and shaking. When they retract their hands, Jaemin swears he lets their fingertips graze an extra couple seconds.

“Are you new here?” Han asks.

The team looks towards him, and he now notices he recognizes a couple of faces from his freshman year, Chani, Felix, Jinyoung and Hyunjin. He turns back to Han and smiles.

“No, I attended during my freshmen and sophomore year but I switched schools for junior year,” he says.

“Oh? Why’s that?”

Beside him, Jisung tenses and his first instinct is to laugh because he should be the one tensing. He’s not entirely sure whether Jisung knows why he switched schools, but he knows himself and that’s good enough for him.

“I just had to focus on other things,” he responds calmly.

Han nods his head understandably, picking up his fries. From across the table, he catches Jeno’s eyes and sees a glare in his face for a second. He raises an eyebrow at Jeno, only for the boy to avert his gaze and talk to the boy next to him.

The rest of lunch goes by smooth, no awkward tension or uncomfortable questions and the whole situation makes Jaemin happy. Since some of the kids on the basketball team are freshmen or sophomores, they don’t know about him and Jeno. In fact, most of the team doesn’t know, either because they transferred while he was away or they weren’t attending while he and Jeno dated. It’s just… nice not to be acknowledged only for being Jeno’s boyfriend. Ex-boyfriend.

He’s throwing his garbage out when he feels a hand on his shoulder, causing him to abruptly turn around with a yelp. Han lets out a chuckle and shoves his hands in the pockets of his sweater.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” Han bites back his smile.

Jaemin nervously chuckles, lowering his hand from his chest.

“It’s not your fault. I get scared easily, this one time I was playing hide and seek and screamed from what I _thought_ was a spider but it turned out to be one of the toilet cleaners,” he babbles.

Han lets out a laugh and Jaemin suddenly wishes he were swallowed whole by the garbage can.

“You always get yourself into situations like that?” Han asks.

Jaemin raises an eyebrow.

“Hide and seek? I mean, sometimes I–“

“No, I mean having an opinion about something but having it changed when you actually see its qualities.”

Oh.

Jaemin’s pretty sure that the tray in his hand is nearly slipping out of his fingers from how clammy his hands are getting.

“I mean, sure.”

“Then what’s your opinion on me so far?” Han asks.

Before Jaemin can answer, Jeno walks by and eyes the two boys before loudly sighing.

“Can you two move? Some people have class to get to.”

It’s the first time Jaemin’s ever-heard Jeno use such a bitter tone directed towards him.

“Sorry bro,” Han pats Jeno’s shoulder while the boy throws his garbage out.

Jaemin feels Han guide him to the wall beside the garbage can, his warm hand on his lower back.

“What was your question?” Jaemin asks, apologetically looking up at Han.

“I was just wondering what your opinion on me was so far,” Han murmurs.

He opens his mouth to answer but doesn’t get the opportunity to when Jeno walks by, bumping his shoulder. The small shove sends him jostling into Han’s chest, but he quickly composes himself.

“Sorry, that was probably an accident. I’ll go talk to him, see if he’s okay,” he says. Before he leaves the cafeteria, he turns around to send Han an apologetic look. “I’m sorry, I’ll tell you later.”

Han gives him a warm smile, sending him a little wave. Jaemin smiles back before turning around and going in the direction of Jeno. The smile immediately melts off of his face when he sees the back of Jeno walking down the halls.

“Hey,” he cups his hands around his mouth to carry his voice.

Jeno looks over his shoulder, completely ignoring him and turning the corner. He rolls his eyes and starts walking faster and turning the corner. He sees Jeno go into a classroom and follows, walking up to the door and looking inside before going in. The classroom is empty, save for Jeno in the back of the room.

“What was that?” He asks, walking to the back of the classroom where Jeno is.

Jeno keeps his eyes on the posters tacked up on the walls.

“Jeno,” he mumbles. “Jeno,” he tries again. He sighs and grabs the boy’s shoulders. “Jeno, what’s your problem?”

Jeno raises his eyebrow before gently wrapping his fingers around Jaemin’s wrists and pushing his hands off his shoulders.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jeno mumbles.

Jaemin scoffs.

“I think you do. Ever since I got back you’ve been avoiding me and being weird. Do you have something to say to me?” He presses.

Jeno finally looks at him, keeping his eyes on him and it takes Jaemin by surprise for a moment.

“I have nothing to say to you.”

“Are you still upset? Is that why you bumped me when I was talking to Han?” He murmurs.

Jeno snorts.

“You really think I’m jealous?”

“No,” he sighs. “That’s not what I was saying. I–“

“You really think I’m still hung up on you? Maybe you shouldn’t think so highly of yourself.”

Jeno brushes past him and begins to make an exit.

“Why are you being so mean? What do I do to you? I thought we both wanted things to be done.”

“Yeah, I did. You were too busy with your studies, your homework. Always too busy to come see me play. I couldn’t be with someone who only worried about their academics.”

Something inside Jaemin snaps, like he gave Jeno one end of a rubber band only for him to let go and snap it against his own fingers. Suddenly, he’s that hurt fifteen year old again.

“Well not all of us can excel in sports, be handed things because everybody loves you. That’s not how the world works for me,” he frowns.

Jeno scoffs.

“Is that why you did it?” Jeno asks, turning around so quickly it startles him.

“Did what?” He furrows his eyebrows.

“Don’t act dumb, you’re too smart for that.”

“Jeno, what the _hell_ are you talking about?” He throws his arms up in irritation.

“If you don’t know then I guess that’s my answer.”

Jeno leaves without another word and the more he runs over Jeno’s question in his head, the more he gets confused. He has absolutely _no_ idea what Jeno could be so upset with him for. There’s nothing else he’s done to Jeno since the break up.

 

The next week, Jeno ignores him and he ignores Jeno. Moving his schedule around just so he won’t run into Jeno by their lockers. He sits by himself at lunch on days that aren’t Tuesday and Thursday, until one day Han joins him. So now, instead of sitting by himself on days that don’t start with ‘T’, he sits with Han and blooms a friendship. He and Jeno keep up with the sour attitude towards each other, only speaking when they have to and glaring at each other when they think the other isn’t looking. Some days are better than others; Jeno would stare at Jaemin when he thinks he doesn’t notice, without the furrow in his eyebrows or the curl in his lip. Days turn into weeks, and then before they know it, weeks pass into months. He and Jeno still argue for the most part but the glaring has stopped, it’s not until a particularly slow afternoon in the library that Jaemin begins to question what exactly Jeno is to him now. They’re not friends, _god_ they really aren’t friends. But they don’t exactly hate each other either. He guesses the word he’s looking for is: tolerate. They tolerate each other.

“Hey, I’ve been looking for you,” Han appears next to him, seating himself beside Jaemin.

“Unless I’ve been cloned, I’ve been here all afternoon,” he lets out a dry chuckle.

Han snickers, throwing an arm around his shoulders and looming over his textbook.

“What’s got you so stressed anyway?”

He sighs, rubbing his hand down the side of his face.

“It’s nothing. Exams are coming up for the first semester and I’m trying to study.”

Jaemin looks at Han alarmed, watching the boy choke on his spit.

“Nana, exams are in two months. You don’t have to worry about that.” Han’s fingers rub soothing circles on the base of his shoulder, relaxing him.

“I know but I’m just making sure–“

“What? Making sure your brain won’t run away?” Han teases. “Listen, you need to stop working yourself so hard. I know your parents, I know that they want you to have the best grades because you’re capable of great things, and _blah blah blah_ ,” Jaemin chuckles. “But, I also know they wouldn’t want you working yourself to the point where your eyes screw shut from not sleeping.”

He groans, dropping his head onto his textbook.

“Why do you always have to be right?”

Han’s fingers gently play with the ends of his hair, the tiny hairs tickling the nap of his neck, it relaxes him to the point where he _almost_ falls asleep.

“Because I know you.”

It’s only been three months since he met Han, and he tries, _he really tries_ not to compare him to Jeno. But it’s so hard not to when Han is doing everything better than Jeno ever did. Han listens to him, Han doesn’t get nervous around his parents, Han is just _too_ good for him. He feels guilty some days, even though he and Han are only friends, he knows he likes Han but Jeno is always there in the back of his mind. When he thinks about how nice Han runs his fingers through his hair when they’re sitting in his living room and watching a movie, he thinks about Jeno and how they used to cuddle in his bedroom while they watched a pirated movie on his laptop.

“Okay, come on,” says Han, followed by the squeak of the chair. “Get up, we’re leaving.”

He lifts his head from the desk, grimacing at the pages of his textbook sticking to his forehead. He blinks several times at the brightness of the library before looking at Han standing beside him. While he bends to grab his bag, he notices Han grabs his textbook and shoves it under his arm. He raises an eyebrow at the boy.

“What? I can’t carry your books?” Han smiles.

He rolls his eyes playfully before standing, joining Han.

“Don’t complain to me when the knowledge of science starts to weigh down your arm.”

Once they’re out in the hallway, Jaemin doesn’t miss the way Han nervously bites his lip before he feels warmth around his hand. He looks down and sees Han’s fingers wrapped loosely around his palm. He looks back up at Han and finds he likes seeing the small color of pink spread across his cheeks. Just as they turn the corner, Renjun appears in front of them with notebooks in his arms.

“Oh hey Nana,” Renjun chirps. “Han, right?”

“You got it,” Han nods.

“Where were you headed to?” Jaemin asks, pointing the several overflowing notebooks in his arms. “And what’s with the notebooks?”

Renjun looks down, as if he forgot they were there.

“Oh, they’re for the poetry club. I made them all throw out their old notebooks and–“ Renjun stops talking midsentence before huffing out a laugh. “Long story short, it’s an exercise.”

He and Han nod, clearly trying to seem as interested as possible.

“Well, I should go,” Renjun hums, moving past them.

Now, Renjun is a relatively calm person. He’s not one to start drama, or even participate in it, Renjun keeps the tide calm and undisturbed. So it comes as a surprise to Jaemin when, instead of going around them, the latter steps in between him and Han, separating their hands. Jaemin cocks his head to the side, clearly confused by Renjun’s actions; Han looks just as confused, raising an eyebrow at Jaemin, who only shrugs. He’s about to bid the other goodbye but then Renjun turns around with a pointed look at him, it only lasts a second but holds a lot of meaning. He knows exactly what that look means. Renjun doesn’t want him to start anything with Han. Jaemin would roll his eyes in return if it weren’t for the fact that Renjun smiles at him a fraction of a second later.

“You’re coming to poetry night at the Neo tomorrow, right?” Renjun asks, struggling with the notebooks. Han catches one of the notebooks that managed to slip off the stack, Renjun murmuring a ‘thanks’.

“Of course,” he nods. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“Good, because the whole gang is going. See you later, Nana.”

He waves at the smaller before turning around and sighing.

“That was weird, right? I wasn’t the only one who noticed?” Han chuckles.

He sighs once again.

“Yeah, I don’t know. He can be _protective_ sometimes.”

“Should I be worried then?” Han quirks an eyebrow.

“Maybe. Renjun is small but he’s scrappy,” he hums.

Han smiles, looking down at the floor. Unless the lighting of the school has mysteriously changed, he’s sure Han is blushing again.

“I was wondering,” Han pauses. “Would you want to come to my game? It’s tonight.”

It happens before he can stop himself but he’s thinking about Jeno again. Jeno has never asked him to go to his games, focusing on his homework instead. He assumes it was because Jeno never wanted him to be there, oblivious to the possibility that Jeno thought it was obvious for his boyfriend to come.

He smiles at Han.

“I’ll be there.”

A smile adorns Han’s face before he nods and hands Jaemin his textbook.

“I have a meeting with the basketball team, but I’ll see you tonight?”

He nods. With a wave, Han leaves and Jaemin walks in the direction of his locker. He’s lost in his thoughts when he feels somebody bump his shoulder. He rolls his eyes, turning to the boy next to him.

“You can just say hi instead of harassing me. Speaking _is_ a thing you are capable of, you know.”

“That wouldn’t be as much fun,” Jeno hums.

“I knew you always hit me for a reason. You think I’m funny, don’t you?” He clicks his tongue. “It’s inevitable, Jeno. People love me.”

Jeno scoffs.

“You wish. The only funny thing about you is your optimism.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” He pouts.

“You really think you’re the only person Han is talking to?” Jeno smirks.

They stop at their lockers, shoving each other’s shoulders due to the lack of space.

“Is that jealously? Green really isn’t your color, Jeno.” He places his textbook is his locker, smiling at the new pictures adorning the inside. It only took him two months to finally like his locker, he figured if he was going to keep this locker all year he might as well make the best of the placement. (Especially since the office told him there were no other available lockers.)

“ _Please_ , don’t make me throw up, I have a meeting to go to.” Jeno cringes.

“Basketball meeting?”

“What’s it to you?”

“Just a question.”

“Well, so was mine.”

“Why do you have to be such an ass,” Jaemin huffs.

“People love an ass,” Jeno teases.

Jaemin rolls his eyes and slams his locker shut.

“You’re disgusting.”

“Yeah, tell me something I don’t know.”

 

Jaemin’s never been to a basketball game before, he’s gone to practices back in sophomore year since Jeno joined the team, but practices are different from the games. When he steps into the gym, he’s taken aback by the loud cheering on the bleachers, the way the benches are packed makes him believe it’s going to be impossible to find a seat.

“Yo! Jaemin!”

His eyes frantically search for the voice, looking at both bleachers on each side of the gym.

“Na Jaemin! Over here!”

Finally, he sees a brown-haired boy standing tall and frantically waving his arms above his head. Hyuck slumps in his seat in relief when he makes his way towards him, apologizing to every breathing thing he passes.

“Na Jaemin in a gymnasium? This is one for the history books.”

He rolls his eyes.

“I’ve been inside the gym before, Hyuck.”

“Yeah, but you’ve never been inside a gym for a _basketball_ game,” Hyuck clarifies.

Suddenly, Chenle and Renjun step past people on the bleachers and plop down next to Hyuck.

“They only had gummy worms, they said they ran out of the bears twenty minutes ago,” Chenle hands Hyuck a tiny plastic bag of gummy worms. “And what’s Jaemin doing here?”

Renjun gasps, pressing his chest to his knees to look past Chenle, as if to confirm for himself that Jaemin is in fact sitting on the bleachers with them.

“You guys are so dramatic,” he groans.

“Since when do you watch basketball games,” Chenle asks, stealing one of Hyuck’s gummy worms, earning him a slap on the hand.

“Since now.”

The game goes by slowly; it’s not that hard for him to follow along despite not attending a single basketball game nor ever watching one. The bleachers are filled with excitement each time the ball is handed to someone on the school’s team, cheering exceptionally louder when they manage to score a basket. Somewhere in the middle of the game, he finds himself cheering along with his friends when Han shoots a 3-pointer, adding to the growing number against their opponent. Han looks towards the crowd after when he manages a layup, the ball falling gracefully into the net, eyes the bleachers wildly until they fall on Jaemin. Han points at him, a grin adorning his face. Jaemin ignores the burning in his cheeks, clapping loudly and throwing the boy a thumbs up.

Down on the court, Jeno has one thing in mind; win the game. Maybe that was one of the reasons why Jaemin and he broke up, he never really paid enough attention to anything off of the court when he was playing. Except, when Han sits down next to him during the intermission, there’s an impossible to miss wide smile on his face. They’re winning but Jeno’s never seen Han smile this wide over a basketball game.

“What’s wrong with you?” Jeno asks, throwing his towel around his neck.

Han throws his head back to take a swing of his water bottle, setting it on the floor afterwards.

“What do you mean?” Han asks.

Jeno scoffs, knocking the boy’s shoulder with his own.

“You know what I mean. You’re going to tell me that that smile on your face is only because of us leading?”

“So what if it was?” Han sticks his tongue out.

Jeno snickers.

“Come on man, what’s got you smiling so hard?” Jeno asks, raising an eyebrow.

Han contemplates, licking his lips once before nodding towards the bleachers. Jeno looks in the direction of his nod.

“Jaemin came,” Han says.

As soon as Han says Jaemin’s name, it’s almost as if Jeno’s eyes are magnets to the boy. Jeno lands on Jaemin, head turned as he talks to Hyuck beside him. Jeno begins to wonder why Jaemin’s there. For every single game Jeno has had in sophomore year, Jaemin has never been there but now his ex is sitting in the bleachers and he had no idea the whole half hour that he’s been playing.

“He came,” Jeno murmurs.

Jaemin feels eyes on the side of his head that almost feel like burning holes, so he looks in the direction of the court. Low and behold, Jeno and Han are both looking at him, seated on the bench while their coach talks to the team. It takes half a second for him to realize that they are all just starting at each other, and he feels his cheeks get warm. As if the two can hear him from down on the court, he clears his throat and he looks away, turning back to Hyuck.

“So then I asked them to–wait, Jaemin are you blushing?” Hyuck gasps. “Who has suddenly stolen the heart of Na Jaemin?”

He rolls his eyes.

“No one. It’s just hot in this gym,” he complains.

Renjun pokes his head out from behind Chenle.

“The air conditioner is on though, and you’ve been spacing out for like the last five minutes.”

He opens his mouth to object but ends up closing it, hoping it doesn’t prove Renjun right. (Even though it certainly does.)

“It wouldn’t have anything to do with a certain boy down there, would it?” Chenle asks, pointing at the bench full of sweaty players.

“I wasn’t blushing!” He exclaims, getting a glare from the students in front of him. He shrugs.

“Name a bigger lie,” Hyuck rolls his eyes.

A whistle from the referee breaks his glare at Hyuck away, forcing him to look towards the court. He lets out a sigh, waiting for the game to start and he’s staring off into space until he realizes his eyes lead him to the back of Jeno. Jeno’s jersey hangs loosely around his waist, but hugs his shoulders. He’s staring at Jeno’s number, 13, when the boy looks over his shoulder and looks at Jaemin, startling him. He wants to look away and pretend that it never happened but the way Jeno stares at him with intent and warmth, it makes him hold his gaze. It reminds him that whenever he happens to stare at Jeno, it’s like the boy knows and they end up looking at each other from across the room until either one glares and turns away. Jaemin swears he see the smallest hint of a smile from Jeno before the boy raises a challenging eyebrow and walks back onto the court, leaving Jaemin confused. (Read: flustered as fuck.) The rest of the game seems more fast-paced, reenergized and rough. Even though their team is still leading by a vast difference, they play faster and with more drive than Jaemin’s ever seen. By the end, their team wins by 15 points and he has to cover his ears from how loud the school is. Beside him, Hyuck, Renjun and Chenle stand up on the bleachers, cupping their faces with their hands and cheering for Jeno and Jisung.

“That’s my best friend!” Chenle yells, pointing at Jisung down on the court.

Said boy turns to the voice, eyes immediately squinting from his wide smile. Jaemin eyes the crowd, looking for a certain brown haired boy. When he catches Jeno’s eye, he guesses it wouldn’t _kill_ him to smile. So he does. The best thing in life for Jaemin used to be Jeno, the way Jeno held him, the way Jeno loved him, and the way Jeno smiled at him. It’s the same smile that Jeno used to smile at him when they dated, it’s warm and bright and it makes his stomach flip. His gaze averts when he sees a hand waving at him from the court, Han smiling just as wide as the last time he saw. Han makes a gesture for him to come down, so he does. He tells Hyuck he’ll be back and begins to step down the bleachers, apologizing to the students he squeezes by but they don’t seem to care or notice.

“A little birdie told me this is your first game,” Han says once he reaches him.

He nods and sighs.

“Yup, no one’s really asked me to come before,” he clarifies, trying his best to ignore Jeno picking at the back of his mind.

“Well it’s a good thing I asked you then,” Han chuckles.

Han is sweaty, face flushed from the game. Jaemin tries not to grimace from how hot he must be now, but it seems show on his face.

“I know I’m sweaty, don’t worry about it. Let me go freshen up, wait for me, yeah?” Han raises an eyebrow, a tilt to his lips. He agrees with a smile, waving at Han before the boy leaves to the locker rooms. He goes to sit down on an empty spot in the bleachers while his friends leave, Hyuck and Renjun mentioning something about homework, and Chenle’s curfew. So he’s left alone to stare at the basketball court that was roaring, not even five minutes ago. To occupy himself, he ends up staring at the walls of the gymnasium, inspecting the championship banners that adorn the high walls. He’s squinting his eyes to look at a soccer banner when the sound of a basketball makes him snap his eyes to the source of the rubber ball. Jeno stands in the middle of the court, bouncing a basketball and watching it go up, down, up, down. Jaemin finds himself watching the basketball bounce up, down, up, down.

“You finally came to one of my games,” Jeno’s voice is loud in the quiet of the gymnasium, save for the basketball resonating. “Miss me that much?”

There’s a quirk to Jeno’s voice, he finds. He’s not sure whether he wants to challenge the boy or slap him. Challenging seems less violent.

He rolls his eyes, leaning back on his hands that are placed at his sides on the bleacher.

“You wish. You’re not the only person on this team, Jeno.”

“Seems that way. You saw how many points I scored for the team,” Jeno smirks, tucking the ball under his arm.

“You know, you’ve changed so much since sophomore year, Jeno,” he remarks with a curve to this mouth. Jeno stares at him with a blank face. “Your head got big from all of that growing ego of yours.”

Jeno lifts his arm to grab the basketball from underneath his arm and tosses it at Jaemin. He ducks his head, mouth dropped in a gasp when he looks back at Jeno. The boy only shrugs.

“You could’ve killed me!” He exclaims.

“Don’t be such a drama queen, it’s a basketball. The worst it could’ve done is give you a bruise,” Jeno rolls his eyes.

Jaemin gives the boy the stink eye before twisting his torso to grab the ball and throwing it in Jeno’s direction. The basketball ends up missing Jeno by a good two (five) feet, resulting in the boy snorting and bursting into a laughing fit.

“I can see why you chose studies over sports,” Jeno gasps between laughs, clutching his stomach.

He huffs, crossing his arms.

“At least I chose something that was worth it,” he retorts.

It’s suddenly quiet and he’s scared to look up from where his eyes lay at his feet. His sneakers are dirty, worn out and the laces are nearly tearing off, but they’re his favourite sneakers. He’s gone through a lot with these shoes, so even when it is time to give them up, he won’t. And–he’s still talking about sneakers, right?

In the corner of his eye, he sees Jeno sit down next to him and hears him take a deep breath.

“It was always fun whenever you came to my practices,” Jeno says in a hushed voice.

“Was?” Is the first thing he says, he doesn’t tease Jeno, he doesn’t ask him if he missed him.

Jeno shrugs.

“Yeah,” the boy pauses. “You always made my practices fun, even when coach was on my ass about my stamina, my training, I would always look to you in the stands while you did your homework. Practice now is rough, it’s harder than when I was a sophomore.”

He sighs and turns to look at Jeno.

“Remember when we used to have shooting contests after?”

Jeno smiles the slightest, nodding at the memory.

“Remember when coach had to kick us out of the gym because he thought we were actually fighting,” Jeno chuckles out.

“I still can’t believe he thought we hated each other, even when we held hands after your practices,” he snorts.

Beside him, Jeno shifts and looks back at him.

“Do we hate each other now?” Jeno’s eyes are sad, wide, almost like a puppy’s eyes. Like he’s silently begging Jaemin to say no.

“I don’t hate you,” he whispers.

It takes Jeno less than two seconds to open his mouth and agree.

“I don’t hate you either.”

It’s light at first, the touch of Jeno’s fingers against his, and before he has a chance to look down at their hands, Jeno’s fingers are already intertwined with his. He looks up from their hands to meet Jeno’s gaze. It’s soft and fond and he’s never realized until now just how much he’s missed seeing Jeno look at him like this. Maybe it’s the heat of the moment, or the way Jeno slowly inches closer, but he finds himself leaning into Jeno until his arms are wrapped around his shoulders and he feels the boy’s arms around his waist, hugging him tight. The gymnasium is all silence now, the only thing he can hear is white noise and he can feel Jeno all around him. He can smell Jeno’s scent enveloping him, the warmth of his arms around his waist, the soft beating of Jeno’s chest against his own.

“I’m really sorry,” Jeno mumbles against his shoulder.

“Me too. I’m sorry, I never apologized after we,” he stops midsentence, suddenly aware of just how scary that word is. This whole time he’s been scolding his friends on not being able to say it, but the problem is sitting in front of him now, hugging him and apologizing for breaking up with him, and he can’t even say the first syllable in front of Jeno.

“I know, me too.” Jeno murmurs.

He silently thanks Jeno for not making him say it, he presses his chest closer to Jeno and tightens his arms around his shoulders. The two boys reluctantly pull away from each other, only to smile stupidly after.

“So what now–“

Jeno’s voice is drowned out by the squeak of the locker room door, making both boys turn towards the noise. Han smiles at Jaemin, waving at him from a distance. Once the boy is seated beside him, Han throws his arm around his shoulder.

“Ready to go?” Han asks, completely oblivious to the heavy air between him and Jeno.

He looks to Jeno, half-expecting the boy to disagree for him. Jeno avoids eye contact, looking towards the ceiling instead.

“Yeah, sorry. Let’s go,” he mumbles, standing up from the bleachers. He waves a hand at Jeno, “I’ll see you around?”

He prays Jeno notices the hope in his voice, he hopes he can hear Jaemin silently begging for a truce. Jeno smiles and waves.

“Yeah, see you around.”

Han waves at Jeno, congratulating the both of them for the win before pulling Jaemin towards the exit. It isn’t until two seconds after they’ve walked out of the gym that Jaemin looks back at the doors, waiting for Jeno to come out after that and say–well. Say what, exactly? He’s not sure he’s ready to admit anything just yet.

“Do you like Jeno?”

Han’s question catches him off guard, so much that he almost trips over his own feet but Han is there to hold onto him by the shoulder.

“W-what,” he stutters, he prays Han can’t see the blush he feels burning his cheeks. “What kind of question is that?”

Han snorts.

“You’re not exactly subtle, Nana.”

He pouts, furrowing his eyebrows. What’s that supposed to mean? Has Han not seen him and Jeno arguing and fighting since the beginning of the year?

“Han, what–I don’t have a crush on Jeno.”

Can you even call it a crush if you’ve dated them before?

“Are you sure? I mean,” Han shrugs, looking towards the floor and dropping his arm from Jaemin’s shoulder. “I see the way you look at him. I guess you think nobody notices because you’re always screaming at each other but, I do.”

Speechless is the only word that comes to mind as he continues to walk down the hall, his shoulder brushing with Han’s.

“It’s complicated,” he sighs out. “He’s my ex and–“

“What?”

Han’s face is contorted into confusion, the tilt of his head only adding to the picture.

“You’re Jeno’s ex? You dated Jeno?” Han asks, pointing his finger at him.

“You didn’t know?” He cocks his head.

Han blinks.

“Well–no.”

“Why do you think he hates me? The constant arguing and fighting didn’t give it away?” He chuckles.

Han flushes in embarrassment.

“I just thought you guys had this weird tension that crushes usually have. You know, like middle school? The boy picks on the girl because he likes her.”

This time he doesn’t hold back on laughing, his mouth falling open as the laughter pours out and resonating into the hallway. Han flushes deeper, scratching the back of his head.

“Stop laughing!” Han pouts.

“Jeno’s going to die, oh my god,” he snorts.

“You can’t tell Jeno! It’s going to be awkward now,” Han mumbles, crossing his arms. Suddenly, the boy widens his eyes. “Wait, oh my god. What if I overstepped my boundaries? He probably thinks I’m trying to come for his spot or something,” he rambles nervously.

Han’s panic surges his laughter, resulting in him doubling over and grasping Han’s shoulder to keep from becoming one with the floor. Han rolls his eyes once before mumbling for him to get up, ignoring the way his stomach clenches.

“Hannie, don’t worry. Jeno’s not like that,” he reassures.

“Are you sure? I mean, the way he was looking at you tonight kind of proves my point.”

“What are you talking about?” He asks appalled.

Han rolls his eyes, reaching down and grabbing his hand to intertwine their fingers.

“If I had a dollar for every time Jeno looked at you, _on and off_ the court, I’d be able to take us for a forty-dollar dinner.”

It’s his turn to roll his eyes now.

“You’re insane, and not in a genius kind of way.”

They’re outside now, walking along the sidewalk, occasionally coming across a large rock that they take turns on kicking. Han said Jeno’s looked at him at least forty times tonight, but does that mean anything? Maybe Jeno was just looking in his general direction. Yeah, that’s it. It’s not like it matters if Jeno was looking, the boy would never want to get back together, they figured out that dating wasn’t the right relationship for them. Even if he did want to get back together, he’s sure Jeno wouldn’t want to. He’s positive.

“I can smell your brain frying,” Han’s voice interrupts his thoughts. He feels a tug on his hand. “Stop thinking so hard. If I knew you wouldn’t talk so much, I would’ve brought Jeno up along time ago,” Han teases.

He shoves Han’s shoulder with his own, scoffing.

“Shut up. Who said I was thinking about him,” he pouts.

“You’ve never been this quiet before. Even when I completely bashed your favourite musical,” Han smiles.

“Well that’s because I like you,” he smiles coyly, tugging Han’s hand.

“Well, I like you too,” Han grins. “But.”

“But?” He raises an eyebrow.

Han hums.

“You’re not over Jeno.”

Now that he’s hearing the words out loud, instead of his own thoughts, it sounds right. It doesn’t sound like a lie and he’s not disagreeing. But still.

“I am over Jeno,” he mumbles.

He’s said it over a thousand times. To his friends, his parents, to his peers, hell he’s repeated the sentence to _himself_ like a mantra before going to bed, and none of those times felt like a lie. Until now, saying it to Han, someone other than a person he knows he can fool, his words are lies through his teeth.

“Nana,” Han sighs, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk.

He’s unsure of what street they’re on now, silently hoping in the back of his mind that Han knows where they are.

“It’s okay if you aren’t. Like I said, I see the way you look at him. I always thought that he was just your crush, and that I was just there–“

He opens his mouth to object because Han has never been Jeno’s replacement; he’s never tried to mold Han into that box. But the boy holds his finger up, signaling for him to wait for him to finish.

“But now that I know he’s your ex, it makes sense. I’m not mad or sad, I just wish we met before you and Jeno did. I like you, and if we’re meant to be together then we’ll come back to each other,” the boy brings their intertwined hands up to his lips before he presses a soft chaste kiss where their thumbs meet, causing him to flush. “It’s okay, Nana. We’ll still be friends, yeah?”

“Did you just friend-zone me?” He blurts, resulting in Han bubbling out a laugh.

“I guess I did.”

He frowns and huffs.

“Isn’t it supposed to be the other way around? I mean, I’m not over someone and you’re that friend with the crush–“

“Ha!” Han exclaims, pointing a finger at him.

He sighs to himself, closes his eyes in defeat before smiling from hearing Han’s laughter.

“I told you!”

“Alright, whatever. You were right, genius,” he grumbles.

“Damn straight I was right,” Han smirks. “Let’s go get ice cream now.”

 

The next day when he shows up at school, he feels an odd weight lifted off of his shoulders. (That might be because he didn’t pack his science textbook this morning, but it could be Jeno, he can’t tell.) He stops in front of his locker, twisting the combination that he’s gotten used to these past months.

“Get home okay last night?”

He jumps at the sudden intrusion of Jeno’s voice, having just thought of the boy as if Jeno could read his thoughts. He chuckles nervously, refusing the look at him.

“Yeah, I walked–“

“Alone?” Jeno interrupts, (he thinks he detects an tone of panic in his voice, but it’s still the morning, so who knows.)

“No,” he shakes his head, playing with a sticker on the wall of his locker. “Han walked me home. We went and grabbed ice cream after the game.”

“Oh,” Jeno says.

Beside him, he hears the boy jostling things around in his locker, and chooses to listen to that rather than the awkward silence between them.

“This is really awkward isn’t it? I’m not the only one who feels that, right?” Jeno suddenly asks, shutting his locker.

Now that Jeno’s locker door isn’t in the way, he can see that the boy is wearing a headband around his forehead with a few of his brown hairs peeking out over his forehead.

Wait–

“When did you dye your hair?” He blurts, widening his eyes.

Jeno chuckles, reaching up to grasp the brown strands between his fingers. The last time he’s seen Jeno with dark hair was before he switched schools, and he briefly wonders when exactly did Jeno dye his hair blonde.

“Just last night actually,” Jeno scratches the back of his head. “How is it?”

Jeno looks up from the floor, locking eyes with him. The boy’s eyebrows are raised, hopeful and hesitant. He clears his throat.

“Yeah, it’s good. It’s nice, I–“ He sighs to himself, doing his best to not stutter. “You look good,” he settles on.

Jeno’s eyes light up and his fingers grasp the straps of his backpack. Jaemin’s never associated the word ‘cute’ with Jeno since they broke up but that’s the only word in his vocabulary as he smiles at the boy in front of him.

“Thanks, Jaem,” Jeno murmurs.

He ignores the butterflies in his stomach and closes his locker, adjusting his backpack around his shoulder. He makes a gesture to Jeno for them to walk to class together. Jeno agrees with a smile and steps in line with him.

“So what surged the sudden choice to dye your hair?” He asks.

Jeno shrugs.

“I just thought a change would be nice. I liked the blonde but I felt like a whole different person,” Jeno explains.

“And how do you feel now?” He turns to Jeno with a grin.

The boy smiles, looking forward and letting out a content sigh.

“Like me.”

They turn the corner and he stops when he reaches the first classroom in the hallway. He’s about to wave at Jeno, grab the doorknob and walk in, but Jeno’s hand on his arm stops him. The small touch lingers on his bicep, Jeno’s gentle fingers leaving a tingling sensation.

“You’re in this class?” He asks, raising his eyebrows. “It’s been a whole five months and I’ve never seen you in this class. Did you transfer? Wait, are you one those kids that sits in the back–“

Jeno gently presses his hand on his mouth, quickly silencing the younger.

“I’m not in this class, Jaem. I just,” the boy shrugs, and it’s the second time Jaemin’s caught the shy guy in him. He thinks it’s a good look on Jeno. “I’ll see you later.”

And then Jeno bolts down the hallway, going in the direction they came from. The bell rings and it’s not until his classmates step past him that he realizes he’s been standing there for a whole five minutes. He sits down in his seat, sighing to himself as he sets his textbook down and rests his arms over it so he can lean his chin down onto them. The teacher begins the lesson but his mind still lingers on Jeno. But then, wait–if Jeno isn’t in this class, why did he walk with him? His conscious tells him it’s because the boy wanted to walk him to class, but his stubbornness wins and he tells himself it’s because Jeno got distracted. Yeah, that’s it.

(Later when he asks Hyuck about why someone would spontaneously decide on changing their hair, he worries at his friend’s answer.

“People usually change their hair when they’re getting over something. Like, a girl cutting her hair after she’s done crying over her ex, it’s symbolic for clearing her past.”

“You mean metaphorical?”

“You’re in poetry, not psychology. Shut up.”)

 

The weeks go by and it gets weirder until it’s not so weird anymore. He gets used to Jeno walking him to his morning class, (even when the boy ends up being late on a few days to his own class), he gets used to sitting beside Jeno during lunch on days that start with “T”, he gets used to going to Jeno’s games and waiting for him after so he can hug him and tell the boy that he did a good job. He still hangs out with Han, despite the both of them knowing their feelings for each other, and the latter never fails to bring up the new rumors of the day he’s heard about him and Jeno when they sit together at lunch on Mondays. Since they’ve become friends again, their classmates, their friends, the lowerclassmen have been asking themselves if he and Jeno are finally back together. It’s a nice rumor, he thinks, one he wouldn’t mind being true. But he’s worried for each rumor he hears that _Jeno_ has heard it too, and possibly gets annoyed by it. Despite Han’s daily updates on the rumors, he’s never actually heard them _himself_. They’re always getting delivered to him, passed around until he has to roll his eyes and regrettably say; no we’re not back together.

“It still baffles me that you’ve actually been coming to the team’s basketball games,” Hyuck shakes his head in disbelief. “Is your homework okay? Does it feel neglected?”

He rolls his eyes at the smaller, shoving his shoulder. Renjun turns to look at Hyuck, eyebrows raised.

“If baffles me that you even _know_ what the word baffles means, and actually used it correctly,” Renjun quips.

“You don’t have to be in a lame poetry club to know what it means,” Hyuck retorts. “I don’t know if you’ve heard but there’s something called languages class.”

“I’ve heard about it, I’m just surprised that you’re actually aware you’re in that class.”

“Can you two shut up, I’m trying to watch,” Chenle huffs, stretching his neck out to look past the heads in front of him that are blocking his vision.

“Last time I checked, you don’t need your ears to watch a game,” Renjun says as he plucks a candy from Chenle’s bag.

Before the latter can respond, a whistle is blown and all four boys direct their attention on the basketball court. Jaemin smiles when Han waves, smiling wider when Jeno turns around and gives a thumbs up. There’s two small voices next to him and he chooses to ignore the two girls’ voices but he gets intrigued when he hears his name, followed by Jeno’s.

“ _Apparently they went on a date last night, I saw it on Jeno’s story,”_ one of the girl’s whisper.

“ _But wasn’t he eating lunch with Han yesterday?”_

Last night he was with Jeno, but it’s not like he was _alone_ with Jeno. Sure, they’re friends now, but most of the time they spend together is when they’re with their friends. He wants to turn to the girls and tell them that he and Jeno aren’t dating, and neither are he and Han, but the chatter dies down when another whistle blows and Jeno is seen leaping up from the floor and tipping the ball to his teammate behind him. He’s so lost in his head, in the rumors he’s been hearing that he barely pays attention to the rest of the game. Even during the intermission, he remains quiet, occasionally laughing when Chenle says something to which Renjun or Hyuck respond to with a joke. He’s drowning in his own thoughts until he feels Hyuck’s fingers poking his side, pulling him away from the tundra of thoughts.

“What’s wrong with you? You haven’t said a word all night,” Hyuck says next to this ear.

“Nothing, I’m just focused on watching the game,” he mumbles, lazily pointing his finger at the court.

“That was a lie, but okay,” Hyuck remarks, leaning back to watch the game.

The end of the game nears quicker than he expects, (mostly because he spent the whole time thinking about he and Jeno but nobody needs to know that), and he’s stepping down the bleachers to greet Jeno.

“I would hug you but you’re sweaty and gross,” he grins, standing in front of Jeno.

Jeno looks up from the floor, throwing a towel across his shoulder. The boy smiles warmly at him, the eye smile he’s always enjoyed seeing adorn his face.

“Who said I wanted your hugs anyway?” Jeno quips.

“Please, you practically beg for them after every game,” he teases.

Jeno raises an eyebrow.

“And so what if I do?”

The blush on his cheeks is prominent, so he knows there’s so point in covering it up. Still, that doesn’t stop him from wanting to jump inside a trashcan and hide.

“The endings of these games are getting boring,” he clicks his tongue, desperately seeking a change of topic. “Maybe you should switch it up and get in a fight or something.”

Jeno snorts, grabbing his water bottle and swallowing down the water as if he were in a desert. There’s sweat running down the sides of Jeno’s face and he briefly wonders if the girls (and boys) at this school ever think about it as much as he is right now.

“You’ll see a different outcome when we play against someone _good_ ,” Jeno breathes out, rubbing a towel across his forehead.

“That’s a bit cocky, isn’t it? You should get a different size headband, your head is getting bigger,” he teases, pulling the sweaty elastic away from Jeno’s forehead and letting it slap back against his skin lightly.

“Ow,” Jeno grouses, placing his hand over his headband.

He shrugs at the boy with a coy smile, dodging Jeno’s attempt to strike him with his soggy towel. When his chuckle dies down, Jeno looks towards the floor and he notices the boy’s façade has faded and the shy boy has resurfaced.

“So, it’s stupid and you don’t have to come if you don’t want to,” Jeno starts, looking up at him from the bench. “The team is hanging out tonight to celebrate, we’re going to the championships so everyone thought it was a fun idea to have a small get together. Would you, maybe, want to come?”

Jeno rubs the back of his neck nervously, a tick Jaemin’s always noticed about him. The boy normally doing so whenever he’s flustered or embarrassed, something he’s been frequently seeing from the boy these past few weeks.

“Sure, what does this ‘get together’ ensue?”

Jeno huffs out a chuckle.

“Well, Chani turned 18 last month, so…”

Jeno tries to explain with his hands, motioning at him and hoping he gets what he’s trying to say.

“Oh,” he raises his eyebrows in realization. “Um, isn’t that _illegal_.”

“Kind of. We’re all almost 18 anyway,” Jeno shrugs.

He slowly nods, hoping that the nervous tingles he has doesn’t show.

“Um, where is it?” He asks.

“Han’s house. The rest of the team said their parents won’t let them have a party, so Han volunteered,” Jeno explains.

“So Han _is_ going to be there?” He raises an eyebrow. He won’t admit it out loud, but he’s nervous about going because Jeno’s going to be there, and he’s going to be _drinking_. So seeing a familiar face that doesn’t make him flustered every two seconds would be great.

Jeno bites his lip, looking away from him and staring at the ground instead.

“Yeah, Han will be there.”

“Cool, I guess I’ll see you there?” He says hopeful.

Jeno nods, and he turns to leave but he feels the boy’s fingers wrapping gently around his wrist.

“Actually, I can pick you up if you want,” Jeno offers.

“Isn’t that a bad idea?” He raises an eyebrow.

Jeno looks surprised, as if he was suggesting something else but then he nods in understanding.

“Oh, no. Look, I won’t drink so I can drive you home. Even if I do, Han said it’s fine if people sleepover, I’ll call you a cab if that happens. Okay?”

So, he has the opportunity to sit alone in his ex and current crush’s car, before _and_ after a party to which he may or may not be drunk afterwards. Great. He’s never been one to believe the devil and angel on his shoulders, but right now it’s _very_ realistic and he finds himself trying to listen to both the bad and good sides. He’s not sure which side is bad, or which side is good, but he decides to go.

“Sure, that sounds good,” he smiles nervously, hoping it doesn’t show on his face.

“Cool, I’ll text you before I pick you up.”

 

One thing he’s known Jeno for is how jealous the boy used to get. When they dated in the past, he thought the only time Jeno ever payed him attention was when somebody was too close, or when someone was too friendly. So it comes to no surprise when Jeno shows up at his house in his car, apologizing with a smile as Jaemin climbs into the backseat because of the girl sitting in the front passenger.

“I’m really sorry, it was super last minute but Heejin asked me to go together. Do you mind?”

He shakes his head, buckling his seat belt.

“Of course not, it’s fine.”

Except it wasn’t fine. The whole ride ends up being just the two of them talking, Jaemin remaining quiet in the back and staring out the window as he picks with the treads on his jeans. He occasionally contributes to the conversation, whenever Heejin would ask his a question to which he would politely answer. The only time he looks at Jeno is when they’re at a red light, he makes eye contact with Jeno in the rear mirror before Heejin points out the green light and they move forward. He silently sings to god when they finally arrive at the house, the small ‘get-together’ Jeno mentioned turns out to be _not so small_. He’s been to Han’s house several times, and he finds himself trying to hide the shock on his face when they step inside the disoriented living room. Han’s couches are pushed against the wall, the vases he’s complimented Han’s parents on are hidden beside a lamp near the window, not to mention the music blaring through the speakers. It’s not so loud that he can’t hear himself, but it’s loud enough for them to hear it past the wooden door from where they were outside seconds prior.

“We’re going to get something to drink, you coming?” Jeno yells over the music, towering over Heejin to lean into him.

He shakes his head.

“I’m going to try find Han,” he replies.

Jeno leans back to smile before taking Heejin’s hand and going towards the kitchen. He sighs to himself now that he’s alone, his shoulders slumping and his chest heavy. How could Jeno bring a girl? He scoffs to himself. Jeno isn’t his anymore, he’s entitled to date whoever he wants. Still, he pouts, he foolishly thought he was rebuilding something with Jeno. Maybe he gave into the rumors too much.

“You’re here!” Han shouts, throwing his arm over his shoulder.

He ignores the heavy weight in his stomach and smiles at Han.

“I am.”

“When did you get here? _How_ did you get here?” Han asks rapidly.

It’s clear by the red cup in Han’s hand and the slight smell of alcohol filling his nose that Han is slightly buzzed.

“Just now, Jeno gave me a ride,” he says.

“Ah, Jeno. He’s such a good dude, isn’t he? You would know though, right? Why did you guys break up?”

He drops his mouth open in shock, turning to Han with furrowed eyebrows.

“Wh–oh! I’m sorry! I just thought–“

He playfully rolls his eyes and elbows Han in the ribs.

“Shut up, you’re such a goofball.”

“I could’ve been your goofball though,” Han snickers.

“Hey, you were the one who friend-zoned me, not the other way around,” he raises his hands in defense.

Han leans over and smacks his lips against his cheek, resulting in grimacing and rubbing the wetness off.

“We never would’ve worked anyway,” Han says in his ear.

He darts his head to the side to look at Han in disbelief.

“What do you mean?” He asks.

Han groans loudly, throwing his head back.

“We’ve been over this, Nana. Jeno–“

He slaps a hand over Han’s mouth, silencing him before looking around to see if anyone heard. When he’s certain nobody’s heard, he removes his hand and glares at Han.

“You can’t just say things like that Han,” he hisses. “These people go to our school. One word about me and Jeno, the whole school will be talking about it tomorrow.”

“So then why did you come here with Jeno?” Han smirks.

He thinks about ignoring Han, getting a drink and hoping that he’ll forget all about this, forget about Jeno. Instead, he looks at the bodies filling Han’s living room.

“I didn’t come with Jeno, he just gave me a ride. He’s here with Heejin.”

“Is that jealousy, I hear?”

He rolls his eyes and elbows Han harder this time, resulting in the boy yelping.

“It’s not like that. He just told me he would drive me home and now he’s drinking in the kitchen.”

“With Heejin,” Han adds.

“Can I borrow ten bucks,” he suddenly asks, confusing Han.

“For what?”

“So I can call a cab and go home.”

“No!” Han whines. “Come on Nana, enjoy yourself.”

The boy begins pulling him through the crowd towards the kitchen.

“I’ll get you something to drink, nothing hard, I promise.”

He rolls his eyes at Han but doesn’t object, hesitantly taking the red cup the boy hands him. He smells the liquid, feeling less queasy because he saw Han pour cola in the cup after the mystery liquid. He sighs to himself, raising an eyebrow at Han before Han nods in the direction behind him. He turns around, cup still in hand and his heart sinks when he sees Jeno leaning against the counter with his arm around Heejin beside him. Just as he says, fuck it, to himself Jeno looks away from Heejin and towards him. Ignoring the smile Jeno sends to him, he turns back to Han and looks inside the cup one last time before pressing his lips to the rim of the cup and sipping the brown, bubbly substance. The alcohol hits him first, stinging the back of his throat but then the mixture of cola is on his tongue and it’s not so bad. So he takes another sip.

“Good?” Han asks, wrapping his arm around his shoulder.

“Good.”

The rest of the night, he ends up sharing with Han. Mostly because his ride (his date) abandoned him to stay with Heejin, but because Han’s the only person he can complain and whine to about Jeno. Now that he’s not sober, he’s given the liquid courage to admit that he’s not over Jeno, that he _is_ upset about Jeno bringing Heejin.

“He made it sound like it was just going to be us,” he murmurs to Han, swinging his feet in the air from where he sits on the sink.

They’re in the bathroom now, a result of him whining about not being able to properly talk (read: complain) about Jeno. His bum is sore from the edge of the sink digging into his jeans, and he’s pretty sure the dull ache in the back of his head is from leaning his head against the mirror for too long.

“I’m sorry. He’s probably just using her to make you jealous,” Han shrugs. “Lots of guys do that.”

“Yeah, but we already dated. This is different,” he sighs, bringing his cup up to his lips. He pouts when he realizes it’s empty, causing Han to chuckle fondly.

“Is it really _that_ different? Maybe you’re thinking too much about the past, sure, you guys dated already but your feelings don’t just go away. Especially if he was your first boyfriend,” Han runs his fingers through his bangs, pushing the hair back and watching it flop back into place.

“You’re so smart,” he hums, smiling. He brings his hand up to Han’s cheek, lazily stroking cheekbone with his thumb. “I wish I loved you instead of him. It would be easier.”

“Is that supposed to be a compliment?” Han jokes, cocking his head.

He rolls his eyes, lightly tapping Han’s cheek playfully.

“You ruined the dramatic scene! You were supposed to say something romantic back,” he frowns.

Han grins, shaking his head. The music from downstairs is slow, he’s sure it’s a fast-tempo song, but his head is dizzy and he finds himself leaning off of the mirror and towards Han instead. Jeno was his first and only kiss, so when Han begins leaning in too, he hopes that he’s not a bad of a kisser as he thinks he is. They’re a finger length away when Han sighs, leaning his forehead against his own and fluttering his eyes shut.

“We shouldn’t do this,” Han hushes out. “It’s not fair. To me, or you.”

“I like you, Han–“

“I like you too but that’s just it, Nana, we just _like_ each other. You can’t come to me because you’re looking for a distraction, you can’t love me because you’re still in love with Jeno.”

“I can try,” he murmurs, bringing his hand up to wrap around the back of Han’s neck.

“No, Jaemin. It’s okay, stop trying to prove you’re over it, I know you’re not. It’s okay to not be okay, kissing me isn’t going to fix anything.”

His body sways and he’s sure if he wasn’t sitting on the bathroom counter, and if Han’s hands weren’t secured around his waist, he would’ve been on the floor by now with how dizzy his body feels.

“I hate that you’re right all of the time,” he mumbles under his breath, causing Han to snort out a laugh.

They sit in silence then, listening to music through the door and leaning into each other. A loud knock on the door surprises them, Han jumping back and clutching his chest.

“I don’t care who you are or what you’re doing in there, but have you seen Jaemin?”

He looks away from the door to widen his eyes at Han, as if he was looking for confirmation from somebody other than himself that he heard Jeno’s voice. And that he’s looking for him.

“Are you okay?” Han asks, cupping his face and trying to look him in the eyes.

Han’s face is distorted, several copies flooding his vision.

“Yeah, it’s okay.”

“Hello?” Jeno echoes through the door.

Han hesitantly looks at him before sighing and carefully letting his head fall back against the mirror. He watches Han breath deep and swings open the door, revealing Jeno.

“Have you seen Jaemin anywhere?”

Han steps back, widening the gap in the door so Jeno can step inside.

“He should really get some sleep. The guest rooms are filled up but he can sleep with me–“

“No, that’s fine. I’ll take him.”

Before Han can protest, Jeno pushes past Han and looms over Jaemin. Jeno grabs his face in his hands, bringing their faces together and eyeing him like he’s a math problem.

“How drunk are you?” Jeno asks.

“Well, there’s four of you right now. What does that mean?” He responds, smiling when Jeno rolls his eyes.

Han stops Jeno before they leave, leaning in so he can’t hear. He may be drunk, but he’s still a great listener.

“Don’t hurt him.”

“Of course I won’t, I’m not some criminal.”

“That’s not what I mean, Jeno. Nana’s good-hearted, an amazing person, I can take care of him if you can’t.”

“Don’t threaten me,” Jeno says. “And you don’t have to worry about me and Jaem.”

Behind closed eyelids, Jaemin sees black and dizzying white orbs. His head spins when he feels Jeno walk out of the bathroom, quietly whining when his head bumps with every step Jeno takes down the stairs. The sound of a door opening is heard and he wants to open his eyes, mostly to check if Jeno is still there but because he’s curious. Just as he flutters his eyes open, the bitter chill of the night air bites at his hands and he struggles to keep his eyes open on Jeno above him. It’s pretty, he thinks. The view he has now is Jeno, the black night sky like a background to the boy while the stars shine in a mixture of navy sky and moonlight.

“What happened to calling a cab?” He asks, shocking himself when he realizes just how quiet it is now that they’re out of the house.

“I’m taking you home, we don’t need to call one,” Jeno mumbles.

He feels Jeno set him down on the ground, feet planted numbly on the concrete while he presumes Jeno looks for his keys. He’s lifted once again before he’s seated inside Jeno’s car, the plush seat underneath him and the warmth of the heater graciously invades his body. It’s only March, he thinks to himself, why is still so cold?

“Weren’t you drinking? I don’t want you to drive me home, go back in and get Han–“

“I wasn’t drinking tonight,” Jeno interjects.

“B-but your cup,” he hums.

“Water.”

The car engine comes to life and he feels the car rumbling beneath him before he feels the car begins to move. The next time he opens his eyes, he’s looking out the window, up at a traffic light with the red beam glaring at him. It’s now that he realizes he’s in the front seat.

“Where’s Heejin?”

It’s quiet for a moment, the low rumble on the radio playing.

“She got a ride from her friend.”

Even though his head is spinning, he can still catch the snip to Jeno’s voice, the short and cut words.

“Hey!” He exclaims, poking the boy’s cheek. “I didn’t get to say congrats on your win. Now you guys are going to play the champs thing, right?” He asks, looking away from the window to look at Jeno.

Jeno’s side profile has always been nice, he remembers. There’s always been something so charming about the slope of Jeno’s jawline, the curve to his upper lip, the strength in his eyebrows. “Are you mad?”

He gets silence as an answer, rolling his eyes and leaning his head on the window to close his eyes.

“Do you like Han?”

Answering a question with another question, it’s one of the many things he’s found annoying and endearing about the other.

“Well,” he thinks to himself. He does like Han, even though his heart is yelling at him to say no, the alcohol clouds his brain and he answers. “Yeah.”

After that, he doesn’t remember the rest of the ride–the rest of the night actually. But he vaguely sees Jeno tucking him in his bed before watching him climb out of the window of his bedroom.

It’s strange for him to not know what he did the previous night before, confusing, but he finds it’s not as confusing as Jeno when he stops in front of his locker the next morning.

“Hey, I’m really sorry about last night. I barely remember anything and I shouldn’t have ditched you,” Jaemin nervously bites his lip, leaning against his locker and waiting for Jeno to respond.

The boy in front of him has his locker open so he can’t see what Jeno exactly looks like right now. He sighs when Jeno doesn’t respond.

“Jeno, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have gotten that drunk, but to be fair it was Han’s fault. He’s the culprit,” he nervously chuckles, attempting to lighten the air. When Jeno remains quiet, he debates on whether or not he grab his stuff and leave or keep apologizing, but Jeno swinging his locker shut decides for him.

“It’s not your fault,” Jeno mumbles.

“But it is, you were the one who invited me to the party and I left you.”

With Han.

“I really couldn’t care less if left me during the night. I was just worried about Han taking advantage of you,” Jeno furrows his eyebrows.

He cocks his head to the side in confusion, shocked by the sudden bitter aura Jeno’s suddenly giving off.

“What are you talking about?”

Jeno rolls his eyes.

“You wanna know why Han was so quick to volunteer his house for the party?” Jeno raises an eyebrow, stepping into his space. “Because he knew you’d be there, he knew you’d be drinking.”

“Han isn’t like that, you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Jeno scoffs.

“Really? I don’t know what I’m talking about when I’ve known Han since junior year?”

“What does it matter what I think of him? It’s not like I’m yours to get jealous about anymore.”

“Please, I tried looking out for you because I thought we were starting to become friends but I guess we both had different things in mind,” Jeno snarls.

He scoffs, crossing his arms so he won’t have the urge to punch the boy. He was thinking about kissing Jeno just minutes ago in the parking lot.

“Right, you were trying _so_ hard to look out for me–standing in the kitchen with Heejin the whole night. Well, aren’t you my hero.”

“What were you doing in the bathroom with Han?” Jeno suddenly presses.

“Nothing! We were just talking!” He exclaims.

“Since when do people talk with their lips against each other?”

He rolls his eyes.

“It’s not like that.”

“Whatever, you should’ve told me before the party that you were going to spend the whole night with Han. Maybe you should’ve asked him to give you a ride,” Jeno huffs, brushing past him with a bump on his shoulder.

He glares at the back of Jeno’s head, before shouting,

“You were the one who offered me a ride, you asshat!”

Jeno continues walking forward, only turning to look back when he turns the corner and rolls his eyes at him.

Well, that is _not_ how he thought his Thursday morning would go.

Lunchtime rolls around and the butterflies in his stomach haven’t stopped swimming since the Jeno thing happened this morning. Each hour that passed, he was dreading lunch, because it’s Thursday, which means everyone is going to be eating together. So it doesn’t come as a surprise when he arrives at their lunch table and Jeno isn’t there. Renjun slides over on the bench when he notices his presence, smiling before returning to his conversation with Hyuck.

“Hey, no Jeno today?” He decides to ask.

He’d rather not mention any of this morning to his friends, he doesn’t want to give them any reason to raise unnecessary tension in their circle. It’ll pass. Hopefully.

“No, he said he was going to sit with the basketball team today. Something about discussing their championship game,” Chenle says, flipping a page in his textbook.

Jisung scoffs, causing Chenle to raise a questioning eyebrow.

“Why are you doing homework at lunch? You’re supposed to be eating, we don’t need to worry about that yet,” Jisung scolds.

“Aren’t you like twelve?” Renjun quips. Jisung throws a piece of his lettuce at the boy.

Hyucks hums.

“I’m curious too now, studying until you die is Jaemin’s thing, not your’s Lele.”

Jaemin throws his hands up defensively.

“I breathed.”

“Unfortunately,” Hyuck clicks his tongue.

Before he can retaliate with a glare, his friends turn their attention behind him. He looks at them in question before Renjun elbows him and mutters a small ‘turn around’. Turning around slowly, he half-expects for it to be Jeno but is surprised when it turns out to be Han.

“Hey Nana,” Han murmurs sheepishly.

“Hi,” he replies softly.

Even though the buzz of the cafeteria is loud, it still feels pin-silent at their table and around them. Since the party, he’s told his friends what happened with Han. About… well, almost kissing him. So to say it’s awkward is an understatement.

“Um,” Han takes a breath. “Can I talk to you for a sec? Outside?”

He nods numbly, not trusting himself to actually speak right now. It’s not that he’s upset with Han, he just wishes he hadn’t tried to kiss him. He doesn’t remember much from the party but he knows that much. Han was right when he had told him it wasn’t fair for either of them if he did end up kissing Han.

“Okay,” Han holds his hand out for him to take.

He turns to Hyuck and his friends, nodding to them as if to say ‘it’s okay’. They smile in return, Chenle mumbling something about his textbook so their attention won’t be on them anymore. He makes a mental note to take Chenle out for ice cream one day.

He takes hold of Han’s fingers before the boy pulls him out of the cafeteria. Han’s stride is confident, chin tilted up and chest outwards. Meanwhile, he’s trying to avoid the eyes on them with each passing table. Once they’re out in the hallway he feels like he can finally breathe again, despite the gentle grip Han has on his hand still. At the exact moment he thinks about the warmth of Han’s hand against his, the boy slips his fingers away and leans against the wall. He watches the boy slowly slide his back down the wall until he’s seated on the floor, patting the dusty tile beside him. He moves to sit down beside Han, nervously swallowing. The hallway they’re sitting in has a window, a large one that showcases the school’s miles long backyard. It’s a pretty view, he thinks to himself. (Mostly to avoid trying to figure out what to say to Han but he doesn’t pay too much attention to that.) When a ball flies through the air, he decides it’s best to apologize.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Oh,” he mumbles, cheeks flushing.

Han nervously chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Wait, why are you sorry?” Han asks.

He shrugs.

“I don’t know. You were right about us at the party. If I had kissed you it wouldn’t have done either of us any good. I’m saying sorry because even though I really like you, I might have been subconsciously using you as a distraction, I can’t say sorry enough for that.”

Han slowly nods, seeming to take his words in. The boy slips a breathy laugh out through his nose.

“I didn’t think hearing you say it would hurt this much.”

“I’m really sorry. I’m sorry for getting drunk, for dropping all of my baggage on you, for… trying to kiss you.”

Han snorts.

“I never thought I’d have to hear someone apologize for trying to kiss me.”

The two boys burst out laughing, leaning into each other. When they’ve both let out a sigh, breathing into the now quiet atmosphere, Han leans his head down onto Jaemin’s shoulder.

“To be honest, I was kind of hoping you’d kiss me,” Han mumbles. “You know, before somebody else snatches you up.”

“I’m assuming by somebody, you mean Jeno?”

“No, I mean Kevin. Of course I mean Jeno,” Han sasses, breathing out a dramatic sigh.

“Shut up,” he gently shoves Han. “And, since we’re being honest. I really did want to kiss you, I just wish–“

“I know. I get it,” Han smiles contently.

“Is this the part where we kiss, get closure and remain friends?” He half-heartedly jokes.

Han snorts.

“Only if you want to Nana.”

Instead of verbally answering, he turns his head to nudge Han's hair with his nose. The boy responds, lifting his head to lock eyes with him. For a moment, he feels like if Jeno wasn’t in the picture he could definitely love Han. But Jeno is in the picture, so with a gentle smile he places his hand on Han’s cheek, softly grazing his thumb over the boy’s skin before leaning in and pressing a chaste kiss on his lips. Han presses his lips against his, soft and lingering. When they pull away from each other, the weight around them feels shifted, at least that’s how Jaemin feels. The awkward tension he felt between he and Han has dissipated now, leaving behind gentle smiles and, he hopes, a fresh start for friendship.

“Thanks Nana,” Han murmurs, leaning his head back on his shoulder.

“Thank you Han.”

They leave the air quiet and keep their voices at bay. And he doesn’t know why, but Jaemin suddenly feels like he should tell Jeno. He should tell Jeno that he doesn’t like Han like he likes Jeno, that he’s done playing games. But reality hits him and he remembers to himself that Jeno probably doesn’t want to talk to him, doesn’t want anything to do with him. For what exactly, he’s not sure.

“I have a game tomorrow night. It’s our championship game, which means it’s our last game of the season. You’re coming, right?” Han suddenly asks softly.

“Of course,” he doesn’t hesitate to say. “Wouldn’t miss it.”

 

Boomerangs were typically used for hunters, throwing it in the distance in hopes that it would come back with precious things such as birds or animals who’ve gratefully sacrificed themselves to energize the hunter. Maybe, Jaemin thinks, he’s finally found whether Jeno is a good boomerang that brings him nutrition and flourishes him; or if Jeno is the bad boomerang that uses science to swing back to him at full speed and knock him over. Despite Jeno being mad at him, he thinks the boy is his good boomerang. Despite Jeno’s hatred for him again, he still feels vitalized every time he sees Jeno in the halls, in the cafeteria; like he’s the hunter and Jeno is the target he can’t catch but desperately wants.

The number 13 is all he can see tonight, each time he looks away from the red and white of Jeno’s jersey, his eyes trail back only seconds later. You can’t really blame him, it’s hard not to look at Jeno when the boy’s playing the worst he’s ever seen him play. It’s already the second period and they’re losing by twenty points. For each basket the other school shot, the crowd booms alive with a chorus of groans and cheers for Jeno to play harder, to play better, to win. He can’t help but notice that something’s bothering Jeno. He’s spent this whole time unwillingly watching the boy play, and he’s never seen Jeno so tense or off his game. He half-assumes it to be because of him and what happened at the party, but doesn’t Jeno has Heejin now? There’s no reason for Jeno to be playing bad because of a silly argument they had.

The whistle rings through his ears, pulling him away from his thoughts and his eyes automatically find Jeno in the crowd of red and white on the court.

“What’s wrong with Jeno tonight? He’s totally off his game,” Chenle notes, a frown on his lips.

Renjun nods in agreement while Hyuck continues to stare intensely at the game.

“I don’t know but he seems tense. Especially around his own teammates,” Hyuck mumbles against his knuckles.

All he can do is nod and agree, he doesn’t have anything to say because he can’t. He can’t tell them that the reason why he hasn’t hung around Jeno these past couple days is because the boy hates him again, he can’t tell them that Jeno’s poor performance could possibly be because of him.

“See,” Hyuck points towards the court at Jeno. “You see, he keeps bumping Han and mumbling something.”

His eyes snap to Hyuck in surprise before following the boy’s finger, and true to his word, Jeno is leaning down with his hands on his knees beside Han, his mouth moving while Han glares at Jeno. It’s completely absurd, and quite possibly conceited but he can’t help but think this might be his fault.

Down on the court, Jeno pants as he walks towards his position with intent. The play they set up has Han beside him, ready to block the opponent’s way to Jeno. Han says nothing as he moves beside Jeno, arms brushing. Jeno refrains from rolling his eyes, instead letting a huff out. That’s when Han sighs beside him.

“Dude, what’s your problem?”

Jeno ignores the boy, choosing the watch the referee until the whistle blows. He just wants the game to end already, the semester to end, for graduation to come so he won’t have to see Jaemin. It’s selfish, he thinks, that he doesn’t want to see Jaemin with anybody but himself. But it’s exactly why he can’t stand to be around Han anymore without wanting to put his fist in his face.

The whistle blows and Jeno looks up at the ball, watches the blur of orange and black switch from the enemy’s player to his teammate. Beside him, Han is breathing down his neck, watching the boy opposite him. Jeno sees the ball being passed to him, the strong force of the rubber landing between his hands but before he can even think about passing it or shooting, a boy from the other team knocks the ball from his hand and bumps his shoulder. The ball bounces against the gym floor before the referee picks it up and blows the whistle. Just before the whistle is blown, the boy who knocked the ball from his hand walks by.

“Watch your butterfingers and maybe you could catch up,” the boy snickers.

Something takes over Jeno by then, anger taking over his entire being and he can’t think about anything else except wanting to fight him. So he does.

“Watch your fucking mouth,” Jeno sneers, grabbing the boy by his jersey.

The boy scoffs.

“What are you gonna do about it?”

That’s the last straw before he launches forward and grabs fistfuls of the boy’s collar, throwing them both to the floor. The hardwood of the gymnasium floor hurts his knees but he’s sure it hurt the boy’s back more, so he thinks it’s okay for now. Jeno pulls his arm back, ready to swing down when a hand pulls him back by the shoulder. He’s knocked back onto his bum, away from the boy from the other team. While the players gather around, he desperately looks around to try find who pulled him back but he stops when Han stands beside him.

“Why’d you do that?” Jeno asks with furrowed eyebrows. He stands up, dusting his shorts off.

“You’re lucky I stopped you, you would’ve gotten a foul and might’ve had to sit out for the rest of the game. Actually, forget that, I don’t even know if they’re going to let you play,” Han seethes.

“I don’t give two shits about whether I play or not, you shouldn’t have done that,” Jeno snaps, walking by and roughly bumping his shoulder against Han’s.

“Dude, what the fuck is your problem?” Han barks, turning around and turning Jeno around by the shoulder.

Jeno steps closer, chest to chest with Han and breathing heavy.

“You’re my problem. Why do you always have to stick your nose in everybody’s life? Make their life yours,” Jeno pokes Han’s chest with every other word he spits.

Han shoves him, soft but still hard enough to get Jeno to back up.

“I’d choose your next words wisely Jeno,” Han huffs.

“Or else what? You’re going to get me suspended and take captain too?”

Han takes a step closer, but before the boy can say or do anything, Coach Minho steps between them with his hands pressed to each of the boys chests.

“Same team, guys,” Minho mutters.

When the two boys back down, Minho orders them to take a seat on the bench while he talks to the referee. The bleachers hum with a quiet buzz, hushed conversations that are probably (most likely) about why Jeno would try to fight Han and not his opponent. Minho comes back with a disgruntled expression on his face, clipboard in hand.

“You’re not allowed to play, they gave you a timeout for fifteen minutes,” Minho sighs.

Jeno glares at the floor. He really only has himself to blame for this, but the only thing clouding his vision is Han and Jaemin.

Han bitterly chuckles.

“Good, five year olds should get timeouts.”

Jeno stands up from the bench, challenging Han. Minho groans and stands in front of Jeno before he can do anything.

“Han, enough of that. You guys are teammates, you should be helping each other not helping the other team win,” Minho criticizes. The man points to Jeno. “You, locker room. Now.”

A frustrated groan rips from Jeno’s throat, throwing his towel on the bench and roughly snatching his water bottle before stomping towards the locker room.

From the bleachers, Jaemin worriedly watches the boy trudge towards the locker room.

“Are they not letting Jeno play the rest of the game?” Renjun asks, standing up to look past the heads.

Chenle shakes his head.

“They wouldn’t do that. Jeno didn’t hit anyone, it wouldn’t be fair if they did.”

Without a word, Jaemin stands up and begins to make his way down the bleachers.

Hyuck looks at him in panic.

“Jaemin,” Hyuck calls. “What are you doing?”

He can hear the boy calling him, but the only concern he has right now is Jeno. And if he’s okay. He ignores the stares from his peers as he pushes the locker room door open, slowly walking down the slim hallway. When he spots Jeno sitting on a bench in front of some lockers, he sighs and crosses his arms as he nears the boy.

“Jeno.”

The boy seems startled by his voice but does nothing to acknowledge his presence.

“Jeno, please,” he murmurs, moving closer to Jeno. “Are you okay? What happened out there?”

Jeno scoffs.

“Like you don’t already know.”

“No, I really don’t. So can you help me out?” He pleads, stopping in front of Jeno.

The boy looks up from his fingers, the sweat along his eyebrows drying already.

“What do you care?” Jeno snaps.

“Because, I–“ He stops himself. “They need you, you shouldn’t be getting angry at your teammates.”

Jeno chuckles out a bitter laugh, the lack of warmth and humor in it makes goose bumps run down the sides of his arms.

“Why are you here?” Jeno asks coldly.

He stares at the floor for a moment, inspecting the grey concrete. He shrugs.

“Get out,” Jeno huffs. “I don’t want you here.”

His heart sinks to the floor, but he doesn’t like it discourage him. He decides to stand his ground, so he uncrosses his arms and puffs his chest out.

“No,” he huffs. “I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s wrong.”

“Why are you here, Jaemin?” Jeno repeats, louder and voice filled with anger.

It would scare him if he wasn’t best friends with Jeno previously, however he still winces slightly when Jeno raises his voice.

“What do you want?” Jeno shouts.

When he doesn’t say anything, Jeno stands up and pushes his shoulders until his back meets the lockers. Despite the furious look in Jeno’s eyes, the heavy breathing from his nose, he remains calm and stands still. Jeno raises his hand, balled into a fist and he closes his eyes, tensing his body. When the locker beside him shakes and rattles, he slowly peels open his eyes to see Jeno’s fist against the locker beside his head. The boy’s head is hung low, almost touching his chest. His body turns frozen and his mind goes blank, the only sound in the locker room is Jeno’s breathing and the distant sound of a basketball hitting the floor.

“Where were you.” Jeno whispers, balling his hands into fists.

Jaemin can feel Jeno’s overheated body shaking, he can hear Jeno’s panted breaths, but more importantly he feels Jeno let out small whimpers against his shoulder.

“For a whole summer, I waited for you to call, I waited for you to text, to show up at my house, anything. I just wanted to know I still meant something to you. You might not have needed me but I-I still needed you.”

If he was shocked before, then he’s not sure what to feel now. The only thing that comes to mind is:

“Jeno, you broke up with me. Remember?”

Jeno lifts his head from his shoulder, sniffing.

“But you didn’t stop me.”

The atmosphere in the room suddenly weighs down on Jaemin’s shoulders like a tomb. Jeno’s right, he could’ve fought for their relationship, he could’ve said no, you’re not getting rid of me. At the time, he thought he was doing what Jeno wanted; doing what he thought was best.

“Why didn’t you try seeing me? Did I mean nothing to you?” Jeno asks, and he’s just now realizing how red Jeno’s eyes are.

Jaemin panics, eyes widening and he snaps his eyes so he’s looking directly into Jeno.

“Of course not. You meant everything to me I loved you. There wasn’t a day that passed where I wasn’t thinking about you, when you said you wanted to break up, I cried for months.”

“So why? Why did you change schools to get away from me, and avoid me all summer?”

Jaemin cocks his head and hums in confusion.

“What?” For a second, Jaemin wants to laugh because the whole situation seems absurd, he would never switch schools just because they broke up. “Wait, you think I switched schools because I hated you?”

“Isn’t that why you left?” Jeno asks, matching his confused gaze to Jaemin’s.

“No, you idiot. I switched because my parents wanted me to focus on my studies.” Jaemin pauses, frowning at the thought of Jeno believing he would do that. “As for summer, I was volunteering at a summer camp. They didn’t allow phones while we were there.”

Jeno blinks, once, twice before he stands up and drops his arms to his side.

“Oh.”

“Is,” he pauses, debating whether or not he should ask. “Is that why you were so…mean at the beginning of the year?”

Jeno nods sheepishly, rubbing his fingers underneath his eyes. He rolls his eyes at the boy, startling Jeno when he wraps his arms around the boy and tugging his close, Jeno’s arms immediately finding residence on his waist.

“Why didn’t you just ask?” He mumbles.

He feels Jeno shrug.

“I was embarrassed. I thought you were avoiding me, would you have tried to talk to me if I didn’t talk to you all summer?” Jeno asks.

“Maybe.”

Jeno leans back to give him a pointed look.

“Yeah, I guess you have a point. But still, this wouldn’t be such a mess,” he murmurs, rubbing his thumbs across Jeno’s flushed cheeks. “I should’ve said something too. I’m sorry.”

“Let’s just forget it,” Jeno shrugs, running his fingers through Jaemin’s hair. “Can we forget it?” Jeno whispers.

Who is Jaemin to deny Jeno?

The door swings open and Minho stops in front of the door, eyeing the two. The man shakes his head, rolling his eyes.

“This isn’t the time for funny business, Jeno. You’re timeout is done, come on,” Minho ushers.

The two boys pull apart, both blushing furiously, and follow Minho out. Jaemin’s about to go back up the bleachers but he feels fingers gently grasp his wrist. He turns around to see Jeno at the bottom of the metal steps.

“I’m still in love with you.” Jeno’s cheeks flush, but he doesn’t refuse the eye contact with Jaemin.

A smile grows onto his face, like a flower blooming until he can’t see anything from how wide he’s smiling.

“I’m still in love with you too.”

Hyuck and his friends surprisingly don’t say anything when he sits down, except he catches the expressions they give each other when they think he isn’t looking. The rest of the game is like the rest of Jeno’s games that he’s attended. The team makes the best of the last period, gaining points after points and he smiles for each basket Jeno scores, smiling wider when the boy looks to the crowd and gives him his famous eye-smile.

It’s the last couple of seconds that he begins to freak out, because their team is still down by three points and the ball isn’t even in their end. That is until, he can hear Jeno’s voice boom across the court and waving a finger in the air. The ball gets handed to Jeno and the students’ cheers are louder than they have been before, wide eyes either on the seconds counting down on the clock or on Jeno, who stands just outside the ring near the center. The players slow down, waiting for Jeno to pass or shoot. Jaemin watches in pure tension and excitement, biting his lips to the point where they almost bleed. Finally, Jeno bounces the ball once before positioning his arms above his head with the ball in hand, and then he bends his elbows before the ball leaves his hands and rolls in the air towards the basket. The bodies of students hold their breath, all watching the ball in the air until the buzzer rings obnoxiously throughout the gym and the ball slides into the net. Jaemin’s sure he’s the first one to scream, jumping in place and loudly his hands even after they begin to tingle from overstimulation. Hyuck turns to him and engulfs him in a zipper-tight hug.

“We won! We fucking won!” Hyuck exclaims, causing him to burst out laughing.

His head feels light and his chest feels numb as he watches the bleachers rush down onto the court to crowd their team, hugging the players and congratulating them. He’s never been to one of Jeno’s games before, when they dated, so he’s not sure if Jeno pushing past the people to join him on the bleachers is a normal thing.

And if Jeno’s being honest, he wouldn’t have. Before when they were dating, if Jaemin had shown up to watch his games, he would’ve soaked up the applause and told himself he would see Jaemin after the game. But it’s different, they both think.

Jeno stops in front of Jaemin, bravely taking his hand and playing with his fingers. The shy boy that he loves too much comes back to him, Jeno smiles to himself as he looks towards the floor.

“Yes, Lee Jeno?” He grins, his heart fluttering when Jeno looks back at him.

“Na Jaemin,” Jeno starts.

“Yes?” He hums.

“Would you, maybe, wanna go on a date with me?” Jeno murmurs.

He taps his finger on his chin thoughtfully, feigning deliberation. Jeno rolls his eyes with a smile.

“Is Heejin going to be there?” He jokingly asks.

Jeno scoffs, pursing his lips before playfully shoving his shoulder with his other hand.

“No, you idiot. Just you and me this time,” Jeno smiles.

“Promise?”

Jeno brings their linked hands up to his lips, pressing a lingering kiss where their hands meet, making Jaemin’s head spin.

“I promise.”

 

It’s amazing what two months of catching up and weekend dates can do. Despite not seeing each other for a school year and a whole summer, (broken up, he’ll add), everything comes back as if they never broke up. Sure, they’re shy around each other the first couple dates but that slowly goes away after they continue to go on dates. The lunch seating schedule their friends made up failed to continue, Jaemin complaining that he wants to sit with his friends and his boyfriend whenever he wants to. So they made an agreement to sit together everyday except for Thursdays, that way they can sit with their club friends still.

Surprisingly, everything feels normal and _right_. He didn’t know having Jeno back by his side again would make him as happy as he is now, he always thought he and Jeno were done, but he’s on top of the world now. He’s graduating in less than a month and he has his friends and his boyfriend by his side. But he still has _one_ thing to complain about.

“Jaemin! Stop worrying about it!” Hyuck exclaims with a sigh.

Said boy throws his pencil down on top of his textbook with a huff.

“It’s been two months since we got back together and he _still_ hasn’t asked me to prom yet,” he says with a pout. “I’m surprised he didn’t ask me at his birthday party! The whole night he was next to me and he kept telling me he loved me.”

Hyuck sighs.

“Ever thought that maybe it’s because you’re his boyfriend and you guys finally got back together after a whole year?”

“Yeah, but–“

Renjun groans from beside him, lifting his head from where it was laying on his textbook.

“Can you shut up about prom already? You guys are gross and in love, shouldn’t it be a given that you guys are going to prom together?” Renjun mutters.

Hyuck points at Renjun with his eyebrows raised, as if to say “exactly”. He rolls his eyes and picks up his pencil to chew on the end.

“Fine, I guess you guys are right,” he sighs.

The library is the typical quiet scenery, aside from the occasionally beeping from the front desk. He knows he shouldn’t be this worked up from a promposal, but he’s seen loads of them on his social media lately, smiling excitedly when he happens to be around for one taking place. He guesses he should be just glad he’s even with Jeno again. He smiles fondly to himself, numbly chewing on the eraser of his pencil. But still.

“It’s just a nice thought, think about how cute Jeno would be asking me to prom!” He exclaims.

Renjun and Hyuck groan in unison.

“Na Jaemin!”

All three boys look for the source of the voice, Jaemin smiling when he sees Jeno walking towards them with a textbook in hand.

“Hey babe, why are you in the library?” Jaemin asks with a chuckle.

Jeno shrugs.

“I need help with my exam prep,” Jeno smiles, sitting down next to him.

Renjun leans over his shoulder to look at Jeno’s textbook.

“Since when you take physics?” Renjun raises an eyebrow.

Jeno shoots the boy a glare, ignoring his question.

“Okay, let me just finish this paragraph and I’ll help you,” Jaemin says, smiling when Jeno presses a sweet kiss on his cheek.

When he quickly skims the rest of the paragraph, he shuts his textbook and grabs Jeno’s, opening up to a random page. Renjun quietly gasps beside him, hitting Hyuck underneath the table when the boy notices four boys from the basketball team walking in the library with similar textbooks. Hyuck widens his eyes at Renjun, looking at an oblivious Jaemin. Renjun and Hyuck do their best to stay quiet and unnoticed taking their phones out, opening up the app to Snapchat.

Jaemin is rambling about a question from the textbook while Jeno pretends to listen, motioning for the basketball players to align behind him.

“–and that’s why the Sun is so hot. There’s so much of the weight of the sun that it has such vast gravity, making the core get put under colossal pressure and–Jeno, are you even listening?” Jaemin stops talking, giving Jeno a pointed look.

Jeno turns back to him with a nod, blocking his boyfriend’s view with his shoulder.

“Yeah, babe. Colossal pressure, keep going.”

He rolls his eyes, continuing to read the textbook.

Finally, everything is in order and Jeno gives the boys behind him a thumbs up before taking a deep breath and interrupting Jaemin.

“Nana,” Jeno hums.

Jaemin turns to him, puppy eyes and a small smile.

“I have a question.”

“What is it?” Jaemin asks. “Is it about the sun and gravity? Because I thought I was pretty clear on–“

“No,” Jeno sighs, chuckling afterwards. “It’s not about the sun. Here,” Jeno stands up, taking the textbook with him.

Jaemin is confused as Jeno pulls him to stand up with him, the furrow in his eyebrows deepening when he sees Jisung, Chani, Felix and Han standing in line with textbooks of their own in their hands.

“Did…did you guys need help with your exams too?” Jaemin asks, numbly pointing at their textbooks.

Jeno bubbles out a laugh, making Jaemin smile as well.

“No, they don’t need help. But they are _here_ to help,” Jeno grins.

The boy nods to the four boys, turning to Jaemin to watch his reaction. Inside Jaemin’s body, he has chills all over while nerves appear overtop. If this is what he thinks this is, he thinks he might just die on the spot. He watches Jisung struggle to open his textbook before grinning wide at him and showcasing his open textbook with a white paper, a bold “P” printed on it. Chani is the next to do so, minus the struggling, opening the textbook to a white page with the letter “R”. Felix does the same, an “O” on his paper. His heart is racing now, taking a chance at glancing at Jeno, but as soon as he does, his boyfriend smiles and kisses his cheek before directing his attention back to the basketball team. Han gives him a warm smile before opening his textbook, showcasing the last letter “M”. He turns to Jeno, already in a rush to say yes, but Jeno stops him. The boy opens the physics textbook in his hand, flipping to a different page with a large, bold question mark.

When he looks back at Jeno, he’s nervously biting his lip and he knows he shouldn’t be making Jeno wait this long for an answer but he’s so _so_ happy.

“Answer, you dummy!” Hyuck suddenly yells.

He blinks out of his trance, looking at the textbooks that spell out “PROM” before turning back to Jeno and launching forward to press his lips against Jeno’s. Behind closed eyes, he can hear the library erupt in applause and cheers but he only focuses on the way Jeno is smiling against his lips, peppering his lips with small quick pecks. He pulls away, nuzzling his nose in Jeno’s neck and wrapping his arms around his neck. His heart already feels warm, overheated but when Jeno secures his arms around his waist, he melts into a puddle of mush against Jeno.

“I love you,” he hears Jeno whisper in his hear.

“I love you too,” he reciprocates, voice muffled by Jeno’s sweater.

They pull back and Jaemin’s not sure when he started crying, but Jeno’s wiping the tears from underneath his eyes with a fond smile.

“Is that a yes?”

He rolls his eyes with a smile.

“Of course.”

 

Jaemin’s excited for prom. Despite bickering with Jeno on who gets to wear the mahogany jacket while the other wears the navy jacket, he couldn’t wait to spend the whole night with his friends and Jeno before they graduate. (Jeno ended up caving in and letting him wear the mahogany jacket.)

Except, chaos happens. Well, not _really_.

Jeno goes away on a two day trip to a ski resort. Jaemin was worried about a lot of things while his boyfriend went away. Worried that Jeno might forget about him, Jeno might realize he doesn’t want him anymore, worried that Jeno found someone better. Except, when Jeno comes back it’s _none_ of the three. Rather, Jeno’s leg in a cast with an apologetic smile while he lies in a hospital bed, just days before prom.

(“The jump from the ski lift looked a lot less intimidating.”

“Your leg is broken, Jeno!”

“But my love for you isn’t”.)

Despite Jeno being the world’s worst distance tracker, Jaemin finds himself checking himself in the mirror. The mahogany would’ve looked better on Jeno, he realizes. It’s a little regretful that he couldn’t get pictures with Jeno, his parents probably would’ve embarrassed him anyway.

His phone lights up with a text from Hyuck, telling him they’re outside. Even though Jeno is in the hospital, he had said he didn’t want to keep his friends from their only prom night, (aside from Chenle and Jisung.) But being friends with Jeno means sacrificing a lot of things for him out of love, so Jaemin convinced their friends to see him in the hospital.

Jaemin steps out in the dry weather, the humid wind blowing against his skin and he grimaces. He tucks his phone in the pocket of his dress pants as he walks towards a truck. He gasps when he almost forgets to grab something, so he rushes back inside to grab the navy jacket lying across the back of the couch and the plastic box with the corsage on the table. He runs back outside, but finds himself gasping once again when he sees the driver.

“Is that Mark Lee?” He gapes, making a show of looking.

Mark rolls his eyes with a smile, dropping one of his hands from the steering wheels to wave.

“It’s nice to _finally_ see you too Jaemin,” Mark says with a coy grin.

Hyuck opens the door for him before leaning back against the seat beside Mark.

“Are you the chaperone for us tonight?” He jokes, hopping inside and closing the door behind him.

As soon as the question leaves his lips, Mark falls silent and Hyuck’s cheeks tint a pink shade.

“Wait,” he eyes the two. “Are you…when did this happen?”

“It’s just a prom date,” Hyuck mumbles. “I didn’t want to go stag, that would’ve been embarrassing.”

“What about Renjun?” He asks.

Hyuck makes a face of distaste.

“As if I’d ever go anywhere with him.”

“He already had a date, didn’t he?”

“Yeah.”

After thanking Mark for the ride, making small talk and picking up Renjun, they arrive at the hospital and get a couple fond smiles from the nurses they pass on the way to Jeno’s room. When they reach Jeno’s room he turns around and brings his finger up to his lips, signaling for them to be quiet.

“Follow my lead,” he whispers.

All three boys nod, waiting for Jaemin to open the door. He twists the handle downwards, creaking the door open slowly, but as soon as there’s a gap wide enough to slip through, Renjun shoves the door open wider with a shout and runs inside, Hyuck and Mark following closely behind. Jaemin sighs to himself, face palming before walking in and closing the door behind him. The slight annoyance dissipates when he sees Jeno sitting up in the hospital bed with a bright smile on his face, his eyes lit up.

“What are you guys doing here?” Jeno asks, still smiling.

“We wanted to surprise you. We weren’t going to let you spend prom alone, what kind of friends do you think we are?” Renjun scoffs, giving Jeno a side hug.

“I can’t believe you guys, I told you to go enjoy prom,” Jeno pouts, feigning his sadness. “You even got Mark here, I can’t believe you’re not dead.”

“Well, we had to dig him up and resurrect him, so,” Hyuck shrugs with an eye-roll.

Mark sighs.

“Nana,” Jeno calls.

Jaemin smiles at Jeno, stepping closer so he can stand beside his bed. He brings his hand up to brush the hairs out of Jeno’s face, lingering his thumb across the boy’s cheek, and his heart grows warmer when Jeno leans into his touch.

“Okay, let’s go. They’re getting gross again,” Hyuck fake-gags, pulling Mark towards the door.

Jaemin and Jeno roll their eyes, but don’t try to stop them.

“I have to go anyway,” Renjun says. “My date’s already at the hall, so.”

Hyuck waves at the two of them, Renjun smiling and Mark voicing a promise to see each other soon. With a sigh, he turns back to Jeno and smiles when the boy is already looking at him. But it’s not just any look, it’s the same look he’s talked about before; the one Jeno used to give him when they dated back in freshman year. It’s the one where Jeno’s eyes are so _so_ deep and warm and inviting, so much that Jaemin can stare at them all day for the rest of his life. Without a word, Jaemin motinos for Jeno to lean forward so he can wrap the navy jacket around Jeno’s shoulders. He pulls the white flower corsage out of the clear plastic box, leaning down to press a kiss on Jeno’s cheek before he slips the elastic ribbon around Jeno’s empty wrist. Jeno shimmies until there’s a small space beside him on the bed, patting the lumpy mattress for him to sit beside him. He slips off his dress shoes and climbs into the bed, cuddling up next to Jeno, making sure to be mindful to his casted foot. They sit in silence for a while, feeling each other’s warmth and listening to the nightlife of the city.

“Thanks for coming,” Jeno softly says.

“You don’t have to thank me. You’re my boyfriend, and I don’t care what anybody says. It doesn’t matter where the prom is, I go where you go.”

He looks up at Jeno, leaning in to softly brush hair nose against Jeno’s before closing the distance between them and kissing him. Jeno breathes out in content, sighing softly into his mouth and tilting his head to deepen the kiss. He softly moves his lips against Jeno’s, his hand blindly finding his boyfriend’s and intertwining their hands. If somebody had told Jaemin nine months ago that he’d be spending his prom night in a hospital bed, making out with Jeno, he would’ve laughed in their face and probably would’ve laughed about it again later with Hyuck. But he wouldn’t have it any other way, it’s perfect.

Remember when Jaemin said his life is like a boomerang? Lying down next to Jeno with their hands (and Jeno’s right foot) intertwined, he knows for sure Jeno is his boomerang; because Jeno is his life and he’s Jeno’s.

_Fin_

**Author's Note:**

> this took four days yikes  
> I didn't proof-read this rip, so if there's any mistakes it's bc I only wrote before I went to bed lmaoo  
> thanks for reading :)  
> 


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